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more about #nfl more comments → Chris Hanson's Axe: He was also soundly cheered everytime he touched the ball. You could mention that. more » Karlifornia: Is Tom Cable gonna have to choke a bitch? The answer is "no", because the Raiders are about to win! more » twoeightnine: I believe that woman suffers from Stockholm Syndrome. more » Chris Hanson's Axe: 51-49! Holy shit! That changes everything! We CLEARLY need to abolish the DH. more » Steve U: Anyone else with Time Warner lose the Fox HD video feed for Eagles-Falcons? Mine has been out for almost half an hour now, but every other channel is... more » BruschisBrewsky: I'd like to point out that Vince Wilfork ran a 5.08 40 time at the combine, and any website that projects Rajon Rondo running a slower 40 than Vince W... more » Chris Hanson's Axe: Mike Vick can make that shot. Right-handed. Not joking. more » The Gizmo from Pismo: Um...did I miss a memo on the tumblr references at the end of posts? more » DirkToberFest: I saw this movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city, keeping its SPEED over fifty, and if its SPEED dropped, it would explode! I think it was... more » David Hume: In a related story, Ryan Leaf was arrested early Thursday morning for 'autographing' a small snowbank outside of Buckshot Biff's Bar and Grill in Boze... more » -
#nfl
A Turdfest On Paper Gives Us A Few Gems
Ten early games, and only one features two teams with winning records. Rex Grossman, Matt Moore, Brodie Croyle, Daunte Culpepper and Chris Redman all took snaps today. But what's this about upsets? More » -
#nfl
Your Late Games Open Thread
Mike Vick was soundly booed every time he touched the ball, until his two TDs heralded "We Want Vick" chants. Probably led by these two ladies! Discuss the beginning of Tony Romo's annual December meltdown in the comments. [AJC] -
#nfl
Hey Look, More Things Wrong With NFL Overtime!
As if it weren't enough that a random coin toss essentially decides the winner in a significant majority of overtimes, now comes SCIENCE! to tell us that the flip of the coin may not be so random. More » -
#nfl
Your Early Games Open Thread
Middle America wins the 1:00 games slate (or should I say "noon games," our new Hardee's-eating overlords?) as us coastal elite miss out on the promising Indy/Tennessee game. I promise to be nicer next time I'm changing planes. [The506] -
#egos
As It Turns Out, NBA Players Haven't Completely Tuned Out David Stern
The Celtics' ever-humble Rajon Rondo challenged the Titans' Chris Johnson — who's so fast, he reminded Gus Johnson of a felon — to a footrace. Why do NBA players think they can hack it in the NFL? Blame the commish. More » -
#nfl
Having Eli Manning's Autograph More Humiliating Than Losing To Eli Manning
In the catalog of manufactured outrage, it's hard to think of a dumber example than Dallas players somehow being angry at Eli Manning for signing a wall in the new Cowboys Stadium. Plaster has never been so disrespected! More » -
#nfl
Our Nation's Athletes' Traffic Violations Are No Longer Below-The-Fold News
Adrian Peterson was ticketed for doing 109 in a who-cares-how-many mph zone. But a police spokesperson took pains to assure the press that the traffic stop was "very routine." This is the world we live in now. [Pioneer Press] -
#duan
Looking For Dick
This is what it means to be a Bills fan: You spend your December days hunched over a team photo like some Bletchley Park code cracker, looking for proof that your recently shitcanned coach has been photoshopped into oblivion. More » -
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#ballsdeep
LOOK AT MY STRIPED SHIRT! Jamboroo, Week 13
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed. More » -
#nfl
An 18-Game NFL Season? Be Careful What You Wish For
There's rumblings that the NFL is looking into the possibility of expanding the season by two weeks. This might sound like Christmas coming early, but there's a few good reasons to be wary.
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#nfl
'Tis The Season To Call Out Your Quarterback
Sunday saw two stars publicly questioning their respective QBs. Now, with a few news cycles to think about it, Hines Ward is sorry. Brian Urlacher, not so much.
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#nfl
Tom Brady Will Never Forget 9/11, U2's Super Bowl Halftime Show
Brady reminisces about 2002: "Your first chance to play in a Super Bowl and winning the Super Bowl, and of course the circumstances of that year with 9-11 happening and U2 performing at halftime — that was pretty unbelievable." [CBSSports.com] -
#duan
Pats-Saints: Your Open Thread
Sean Payton compared Bill Belichick's Patriots to Microsoft in a nice way. Belichick talked wistfully about deep-sea fishing with Payton. At some point tonight, the two men will hop off the tandem bike and coach a very important football game. More » -
#nfl
Does It Make You Feel Better To Know You Weren't Favored To Begin With?
On a shortened Sunday slate, two huge upsets looked possible late. But that's why they play 60 minutes (or in Houston and Washington's cases, 45). More » -
#nfl
Your Late Games Open Thread
Grab a snack from the kitchen (or, if you're JaMarcus Russell, a bag of Skittles from your waistband), and settle in for three hours of either Brett Favre or Matt Leinart. There are no winners. -
#nfl
Your Early Games Open Thread
Well, someone is convinced the country really wants to see the Redskins play. But after last week's Detroit/Cleveland showstopper, I promised the scheduling gods I'd never question their wisdom again. [The506] -
#nfl
Ben Roethlisberger's Brain Deemed Unfit To Participate In NFL Game
Jay Glazer has reported that the Pittsburgh Steelers will pin their hopes on the right arm of Dennis Dixon for Sunday's game against the Baltimore Ravens after it was decided that Ben Roethlisberger won't play due to "exercise-induced headaches." [FoxSports] -
#duan
NFL Network Apologizes For Terrible Motherf@*^ing Mistake
The NFL Network takes you inside the game like no other broadcast entity can. Who else could get a shot of Josh McDaniels swearing at offensive lineman on the sideline, then broadcast it live and completely unedited? Absolutely no one. More » -
#ballsdeep
LAST PICKLE IN THE JAR! Your Thanksgiving Jamboroo
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed. More » -
#nfl
Heads Roll At NFL's Concussion Committee
Ira Casson and David Viano, co-chairmen of the NFL's brain-injury committee and spiritual heirs to the quacks who cooked medical studies for Big Tobacco, have resigned. In response, NFL retirees forgot what they were going to say. [NYT] -
#nfl
Illicit High-Five Is Apparently A Thing Now
The NFL actually had to release a statement explaining that what happened between referee Jerome Boger and Vince Young on Monday was not technically a high five. You say "tomato," I say "terrorist palm slap." [Houston Chronicle, PFT] -
#nfl
Someone Actually Tried To Blackmail Tom Coughlin?
A 30-year-old Philadelphia man, who lawyers say is mentally disabled, has pleaded guilty to sending threatening email messages to Tom Coughlin. Or are they just naturally assuming that any blackmailer who would choose Coughlin as his target must be deranged? More » -
#nfl
Man Dating Woman Made Famous For Anti-Homo Pageant Speech/Sex Tape Will Start For Rams
Kyle Boller. You remember him. He was Joe Flacco before it was fashionable to be Joe Flacco. Now, Boller will most likely start in place of the broken-legged Marc Bulger. [Sky Sports/Photo: Radar] -
#weekendwinner
Matthew Stafford Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Matthew Stafford, who won the weekend by suddenly turning into Bobby Layne, minus the crippling hangovers. More » -
#nfl
These Men Are The Best QBs Of The Day. Really.
I'm sure the fact that they were facing the Lions and Browns defenses had nothing to do with their spectacular numbers. But some quality defenses had tough afternoons as well. More » -
#nfl
Your Late Games Open Thread
The Jets got an early morning wakeup call in their New England hotel, apparently a common occurrence for teams preparing to play the Patriots. No word yet if Mark Sanchez got the required amount of beauty sleep. [PFT] -
#nfl
Your Early Games Open Thread
Some decent matchups today in Baltimore, New York and Green Bay. Please note the incredible accuracy of the TV distribution map, which correctly notes that Jacksonville won't be getting the Jaguars game. [The506] -
#nfl
Ricky Williams - Battier Than You Realized
Williams credits his success and durability this season to a new type of alternative medicine. No, he doesn't mean weed, as we're all assuming. Ricky's "pranic healing" regimen is far stranger. More » -
#nfl
Iraqis Now Using Favre-Based Warfare
Iraqi militants have resorted to the lowest sort of psychological tactics in an attempt to break down our soldiers: bringing up Brett Favre.
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#nfl
In Blackout Roulette, Jags To Bet It All On...Teal?
Sixteen years ago, one grassroots organization brought the Jaguars to Jacksonville. Now they're back, doing everything they can to keep them there. (Note: "everything they can" appears limited to coupons for nachos and soda at one game.) More » -
#ballsdeep
Pre-Thanksgiving, Coke Pinkies And Nazi Dinosaurs. Jamboroo, Week 11
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed. More » -
#nfl
Chicago Has Pretty Much Completely Turned On Jay Cutler
It's bad; they've taken to calling him "Jay McNown." But the beleaguered QB finds an unlikely defender in the father of former Bears washout Rex Grossman. Dan Grossman's endorsement floated 50 yards and was intercepted by Brian Griese. [Chicago Tribune] -
#nfl
Who Had Dick Jauron In Their Pool?
Now that guy got canned! The Bills owner said he fired his head coach today, because "nothing ever seemed to go right." That is very perceptive, Ralph. [Buffalo News] -
#scary
Steeler Fan Says Bears Fans Blinded Him With Roofies
They say that you should never take a drink from stranger that you didn't see poured yourself. That goes double for Steeler fans hanging out in Chicago bars, after one poor bloke says he was poisoned by local Ditka worshipers. More » -
#nfl
Mina Brees' Death Ruled A Suicide
Drew Brees' mother died three months ago at the home of a friend in northern Colorado. A coroner now says she killed herself by ingesting "a large quantity of prescription medications." [Austin American-Statesman] -
#crime
Tila Tequila Not Finished With Shawne Merriman Yet
The D.A. wouldn't prosecute Merriman for assaulting the TV "personality," but she can still sue him for assault, battery, false imprisonment and emotional distress. Oh, you better believe you haven't heard the last of this. [TMZ] -
#nfl
Just To Mess With Their Fans' Heads, Bengals Bring In Larry Johnson
Feeling pretty good about that 7-2 record, Bengal backers? In the AFC North driver's seat with a very favorable schedule ahead? Well, Mike Brown can definitely change that. What your team needs is a fourth-string RB with an attitude problem! More » -
#nfl
Belichick Was Right
I enjoy a national shanking of Bill Belichick as much as anyone, but I'm with Neon here: Belichick, who has won three Super Bowls treating football the way an actuary treats a term life policy, made the smart call yesterday.
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#nfl
Crazy Old Man Gives Bills The Bird
Unfortunately, that grumpy coot just happens to be the owner of the Tennessee Titans and his affinity for the ol' double deuce is now immortalized on YouTube. If you have hands, feel free to nervously wring them. More » -
#weekendwinner
Peyton Manning Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Peyton Manning, who won the weekend when it was gift-wrapped with a pretty bow and handed to him by Bill Belichick. More »
