The 150th anniversary of the Gettysburg Address is coming up, and the Bakersfield Condors of the East Coast Hockey League are ready to celebrate the occasion in style. Which is to say, they will play a hockey game while wearing the patriotic-as-shit jersey you see above.
This jersey has everything a hockey team needs to express its appreciation for our nation's history: A stoic Lincoln getting ready to give his famous speech, cannons, a Bud Light decal, and a Condor in a top hat. It's even got a transcription of the speech and a battle scene on the back:
The good news for people who love hockey and America in equal measure is that these jerseys will be auctioned off after the Condors' game on Sunday. You might think about buying one for your grandfather who still has that miniature model of the Battle of Bull Run in his basement.