Fidel Castro: Hello?
Alex Rodriguez: Fidel? Hey, it's A-Rod. Alex Rodriguez. I play for the Yankees.
Castro: Yes, yes, Alex, hello. Did you get the cigars? I left them for you at Tommy's underground poker game. You are in deep to those people, yes?
A-Rod: I can't really talk about it, Fidel. That debt is why I have to carry around this teddy bear filled with heroin.
Castro: Yes. So how can I help you, Alex?
A-Rod: Well, I hear you're going to have a team in the World Baseball Classic.
Castro: Yes, it is an exciting day for my country and a victory over the fascist regime of President Bush.
A-Rod: Uh, yeah, well, anyway, I was kind of wondering if you had any extra roster spots on that team. I did some research, and apparently my great uncle knew a guy who once lived in Cuba for a couple of weeks. I'm thinking of joining your team.
Castro: That would be wonderful, yes; it would strike at the heart of our oppressors.
A-Rod: Sure. Can I play shortstop? I'd really like to play shortstop.
Castro: Yes, of course. You will be our cleanup hitter.
Castro: So, we shall see you in March?
A-Rod: Oh, no, I'm playing for the Dominican team, I think. Maybe. How much can you pay?
Castro: You will make the same as the rest of the team. This cohesiveness is for the greater good.
U.S. Approves Cuba For World Baseball Event [New York Times]