The Gospel According To Bobby Knight

Remember the Larry Krueger radio imbroglio from this past summer? His replacement on KNBR-680 Sportsphone radio, Damon Bruce, hasn't really been all that much of an improvement (although he refrains from slurs against Dominican hitters, we'll give him that). Bruce has his moments, though. One came on Monday night, in a recurring feature he calls "The Gospel According to Bobby Knight."

Bruce attended Indiana University, and while sports radio hosts recounting their college days is not generally our idea of great radio, this story was good. Bruce recalled how, in 1996, he took a class taught by Knight called "Coaching Basketball." "The rules were clear from the outset," said Bruce. "If you were late to class, you failed. If you wore a hat to class, you failed. Knight had this way of boring in and getting right to the heart of things. He is very intelligent. He would ask you, 'What are you doing in college that is going to help you when you get out? How is what you are doing now going to prepare you for when you're 30?' He is so grounded in reality. He is a flawed man, like most of us are. But when it comes to basketball, he is just really dialed in.

"So the day was Sept. 24, 1996. I rolled out of bed to get to this class that started at 8 a.m. And here's what I learned that day. Bobby Knight ran off a checklist for becoming a successful basketball team. These are his ten rules for success in the game of basketball. Knight's Ten Commandments. They are:

• 1. Shot selection. Who shoots? Where, when and how?
• 2. Develop role players. You need a player who can set an offensive screen. You need a rebounder. You need a shooter.
• 3. Everybody rebounds. Everybody.
• 4. Player movement. How hard are you going to play on offense? A team that stands around will not be successful.
• 5. Spacing. Fifteen-to-18 feet between players on offense.
• 6. Be organized on offense. Attack the basket. Very few people can guard the driver.
• 7. Are you scoring inside points?
• 8. Less than 10 turnovers. One turnover equals two shots.
• 9. Offensive rebounds are mandatory.
• 10. How soon in the game did you get to one-and-one?"

You've probably added your own additional joke commandments by now (we suggest something with Connie Chung). But those won't help you beat Wisconsin, son. Class dismissed.

(Speaking of Bobby, anybody else hear these rumors that he could end up at Mizzou next year?)