Please Submit Your Big Unit Jokes Here

When we first heard the news we were a little repulsed, then a bit intrigued ... then repulsed again. My Damn Yankee Dad Blew Me OffRandy Johnson has a love child. Let those words tumble about in your brain for a moment as you admire the funkiness. The Yankees pitcher, before he was a big star, made sweet, sweet Big Unit love out if wedlock. Hey, it happens. Can't you see the resemblance?

The news surfaced because Johnson is suing his former girlfriend, Laurel Roszell, for $97,000 in child-care payments, monies he said never went for care of the child, Heather, now 16. She lives with her mother in Langley, Wash. Johnson said he had had enough when Roszel recently asked him to buy Heather a car and a computer, on top of the $5,000 per month he already pays in child support. Roszell says that Johnson is only suing because he's still mad at her for dumping him. "It wasn't mutual," she told The New York Post of their breakup.

This, of course, is the type of story New York tabloids live for, and hey, who are we to deny them their fun? Besides, the "Liitle Unit" jokes still make us laugh.

My Damn Yankee Dad Blew Me Off [New York Post]
Brushback Pitch [New York Daily News]