We salute The Boston Phoenix for a nifty piece of self-promotion: Putting together a list of the 100 least sexy male celebrities. The list is topped by Gilbert Gottfried, and the top 10 includes Dr. Phil, Jay Leno and Roger Ebert, whose weight loss, we might argue, pushed him higher on this list rather than lower.
As you might expect, several sports figures made the list, topped by Randy Johnson, who comes in at No. 2. The paper says, "If he couldn't throw a ball 100 miles per hour, Johnson would be wearing a wife beater and getting hauled into a squad car on Cops." Others include:
• 29. Don Zimmer. "The gerbil's got a massive, ivory-white noggin' that never did much thinking to begin with."
• 30. Tony Kornheiser: "Yes, calling sportswriters unattractive is like shooting fish in a barrel. But come on, he looks like your uncle. "
Also making the cut: Julian Tavarez, Willie McGee (no!), Scottie Pippen, Jeff Van Gundy and John Clayton. Congratulations, all.