Outstanding work by the Los Angeles Times this morning; the paper has tracked down Jose Canseco. The steroidal monster, apparently having struck out as an action film star (we're still waiting for someone to get a hold of his famous karate demo tape and send it to us), is playing in the Los Angeles Men's Senior Baseball League.
[The manager] sponsors his team, so Canseco doesn't pay to play, and neither do his teammates. But, Zelman says, Canseco throws $5 into the pot to pay umpires every week, same as everyone else.
As we ponder the chill-inducing notion of Canseco using an aluminum bat, we imagine Canseco, before each game, sneaking into one of the port-a-potties situated just behind the left field fence with a balding middle-aged tax lawyer named Harold, as the two men inject each other's asses with large syringes. "Gotta compete, man," Jose says, as Harold chases down the steroid concoction with a generous helping of Propecia and then heads to right field.