America national sport is called baseballs. It very similar to our sport, shurik, where we take dogs, shoot them in a field, and then have a party.

What do you say to the people who see that you are so powerful in your physique, with your powerful thighs and pectoral muscles, and wonder what your schwanzenstook is like?

What is the different types of hash out there? We all know that it's called the bionic, the bomb, the puff, the blow, the black, the herb, the sensie, the cronic, the sweet Mary Jane, the shit, Ganja, split, reefa, the bad, the buddha, the home grown, the ill, the maui-maui, the method, pot, lethal turbo, tie, shake, skunk, stress, whacky, weed, glaze, the boot, dimebag, Scooby Doo, bob, bogey, back yard boogie. But what is the other terms for it?

If one time, when you was high, you sold you car for like 24 Chicken McNuggets, you're ready to be a Deadspin advertiser. Click here to find out how.

• Sony
• Talladega Nights
• Toyota Yaris
• Mobizzo
• Thrillist
• Hershey's