Forget the exploits of Peyton Manning and Ben Rothelisberger. Years from now, when you're balancing your great grandchildren on your knee, you can tell them that you were there on the day that Detroit Lions assistant coach Joe Cullen was arrested for driving in the nude. "But was he totally nude, great grampa?" "Yes, my child. Not a stitch." Or, as the official Dearborn police ticket will forever document the incident:
Subject driving on public street without any clothes on. (NUDE).
The incident actually happened on Aug. 24 and was the second time in two weeks that Cullen had been arrested; the other being for non-nude drunk driving. No one needs to tell us, of course, that Cullen once coached the defensive line at Illinois, where he was when the Lions hired him in 2005. In 2003, when he coached at Indiana, Cullen was involved in controversy when he slapped a player in the helmet during a game against Michigan State, later telling the Indianapolis Star that he had simply been "a little fired up down in the red zone."
Before you ask, no, there is no YouTube video of the arrest. We hope.
Lions Assistant Coach Arrested For Nude, Drunken Driving [Detroit Free Press]
Hey, Coach, Your Balls Are Showing [Jalopnik]