This Is Why They Should Make Protective Cups For Your Ears

We're not sure what compelled ESPN to give us a random story about a high school player whose head was being eaten from the inside out by a nasty beetle, but, honestly, we're pretty glad they did.

[High school fullback Jake Asp] woke up because he felt something strange and painful in his right ear. When the pain became unbearable, family members took him to a nearby clinic. They speculated that something had happened to him in the game the night before.

"Someone said I could have popped my ear drum," Asp said. "...But when I got to the [clinic], they took a look in there and saw it, and I was like, 'What the heck? How did I get a bug in my ear?'"

Asp could hear it, and it nearly drove him nuts. "It was digging and biting into my eardrum," he said. "That went on for, like, 15 minutes. I could hear it — a whole bunch of loud popping noises. It hurt pretty bad."

AGGGGH! A beetle in his brain! Or, to put it another way .... "KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!"

Real Bug In Your Ear? Meet 'Beetle Juice' [ESPN]