Week In Deadspin: Rockin' The Local 138

• We like to listen to John Rocker talk. Jeff Pearlman? Not so much.
• Miami-FIU. What could possibly go wrong?
• When Joey Porter and Kellen Winslow feud, it's a catfight, MEOW!
• Joel Zumaya has BLISTAS ON HIS FINGAS!
Welcome back leather! (And no Berman jokes here!) PETA is not happy.
• It's like a swiss army deer.
• Carson Palmer loves K-Fed.
• There's an awfully tight SHOTY battle.
• Razor Ruddock will smash your trash.
• We hope to someday live in a world where the denizens of the Barbaro Message Board and the fine humans at this here site can peacefully coexist. We are not holding our breath.
• New Mexico forever!

Okey-doke, that'll wrap up the next-to-last-week before the holidays (and a week's vacation for us afterwards, but we'll talk about that next week). The Mighty MJD will take you through the weekend, and we'll see you Monday. Be safe out there.