Nothing Says Valentine's Day Like Six-Foot Tall Spiced Meat

If you can't figure out what to get your significant other for this upcoming Valentine's Day — and you happen to live "within a 45 mile radius from Miller Park" and have V-Day between 1 p.m. and 2 p.m. Central Time open — you could give the gift that keeps on giving: Sausages.

On MLB Auctions right now, you can bid on the opportunity to bring your loved one some sausages. "You'll have the Famous Klement's Racing Sausages visit your spouse or significant other at their home or place of work to deliver a Valentine's present. We'll also include four Club Level tickets to see the Brewers play a game of your choice during the April 18-22 homestand at Miller Park." Currently, though, there are no bids — the opening bid is $650 — and we think we know why: The chorizo is not included. No Valentine's Day is ever complete without the chorizo.

Serenade Your Sweetie With Sausages [MLB Auctions]
Welcome, Chorizo! [Deadspin]