Marlins-Nationals Always Brings In The Big Crowds

We know it's the middle of September, and it's still kind of hot out, and everyone's back at work and concentrating on their jobs — really! — so not many have time to just head to Dolphins Stadium and watch two lousy teams play each other. But 400 people? 400? Really?

It was so quiet and sparse in Miami yesterday that a fan was kicked out of the game for heckling.

"The fan was chirping at the umpire," Nationals catcher Brian Schneider said. "There was no need for it." The man was so loud, and the atmosphere so quiet, the fan could be heard saying "you don't make more than me" on the television broadcast as he was forced to leave.

Ordinarily, we'd think it insane that a fan could actually be ejected for yelling at the umpire. But imagine the embarrassment for all involved, playing a Major League Baseball game in front of 400 people. It has to be one of those days you just want to end, go home, pretend you play for a real team, just get out of there and save yourself any further indignity. And this asshead starts screaming behind home plate for the whole game. We'd probably have thrown him out ourselves.

Crickets [Nationals Enquirer]