For the rest of 2007, the NHL Closer will be written by the fine folks at Melt Your Face Off. Enjoy.

We at Melt Your Face-Off thank Will for giving us the chance to write the Closer until the end of the year. We'll make sure to bring you plenty of the dick and poop jokes you deserve here at Deadspin. And, of course, Sean Avery will make at least one appearance to call someone a dick smoker before the year is up.

Advertisement

Of the four games on the slate last night, two ended because of a momentary lapse in judgment by the goalie. Another...well...yeah, the Blues goalies just kind of ate a cock.

Scott Gomez Will Have the Last Laugh. Former Devil Gomez sent a pass towards former Devil Brenden Shanahan, which he then slotted past Brodeur, ending a scoreless tie 30 seconds into overtime. Gomez and Shanahan were both draft picks for the Devils, and together they sent the Devils to their fourth straight loss against the Rangers.

The Blackhawks Are Getting Better....Slowly. Nikolai Khabibulan was having a great night, stopping several point-blank shots. The problem was he then had a lapse in judgment, allowing two goals in the span of three minutes, sending the Blackhawks to defeat 3-2 against the Flames. Chicago has lost four games in a row for the first time this season. That usually happens by October 10 most seasons. Blackhawks coach Denis Savard said after the game, "It's goaltending against us, period. We dominated the third period until they scored." I think my eyes crossed just trying to comprehend that.

Advertisement

The St. Louis Blues Wish They Had Signed Better Back-Ups. This game got ugly in the second, and it only got uglier. Milan Hejduk notched his second career hat trick, and bumped up his points total with three assists. Paul Stastny got in on the action with two goals and three assists. Blues goalies Hannu Toivonen got hammered in the second period before getting yanked in favor of backup Marek Schwarz. The problem is...Schwarz wasn't any better. Toivonen came back in the third to clean up the leftovers in the 9-5 pasting. This was the Avalanche's 1,000th regular season win. The Blues put their star goalie Manny Legace on IR after he twisted his knee in practice. If the replacements keep this up, this may be great marketing for the league. Who wouldn't want to see target practice every night, with the target being a 6'2" Finnish guy?