Deadspin
With all this other steroid business going on today, we feel obliged to point out that John Rocker is not going to just be ignored. He's hoppin' mad about the "irresponsible dolts of the media."
He seems fired up about "the misinformed writings of an ESPN.com journalist," which is odd, since he's referring to a wire story on ESPN.com. But alas. Here we go:
What I will attempt to do now is cut through the mind-numbing, irrelevant fluff the media loves to fill their airtime and articles with and give you the simple facts that I know and believe to be true, as I have lived them and can explain them much better than some pen jockey who has never spoken to me personally and lives 3000 miles away. Here are the facts using the simplest terms with the most convenient definitions:
Rocker is, in fact, quite simple in his explanations, we'll give him that. And he picked a good day to draw all the attention to him on the matters of steroids. Nothing else going on steroid-wise today, nope.
Comments
I, too voted for John Rocner in a previous presidential election.
Or was it John Rockier? I can't remember.
John Rocker on "Pros vs. Joes" is one of the greatest tv moments of all time.
think that guy is voting for obama?
He spelled Rocker wrong despite having the correct spelling on his T-shirt.
Those are John Rocker's readers.
@Phony Gwynn: I voted for John "Ferrero" Rocher.
I didn't see anything on his web site about Heath Ledger. Interesting.
How can I become a pen jockey? That sounds like fun.
I didn't know James Garner was such a terrible racist.
John Rockner, All-American.
THAT GUY IS OFF HIS ROC∑R
He needs to SPELL ENGLISH
@Da_Mang: I don't think they can read.
"I will do to the record what I should have done to those queers on the subway a long time ago..."
@Da_Mang: maybe he's going for a very subtle "Rock her? I barely know 'er!"
Rocker lacks experience and is short on the details. We need a president that can start making a difference day one.
@Lady Andrea: First, you need a real small saddle.
Did you hear that Will? Rocker thinks you're a pen jockey
When you think about it, wouldn't any point in time in which he was in MLB be "early in his career"?
@asliceofbacon:
I don't know, but I GUARANTEE he's watching the Daytona 500 this weekend.
Not to defend a POS like Rocker, but that 'rebuttal' was up on his site yesterday afternoon so he wasn't totally being a spotlight-grabbing whore.
Hopefully a Silkwood shower will get the Rocker off of me after visiting his web page.
@Trenton Makes The World Takes: Lacks experience...short on details...Obama?
Your Georgia public schools at work.
How bad can Rocker be? See this in his banner? A kitten.
John Rocker likes kittens.
The guy in the picture is totally Mike Huckabee's target audience.
Can we get John Rocker elected President of another country? I mean, not the USA, cause I have to live here. But I'd just like to see how fast chaos ensues when people actually have to listen to him.
Canadian 'Spinners, I'm looking in your direction...
The Eartha Kitt-catwoman he is posed with on his website is a "freelance writer". Does he call her a "pen jockey"? Or does he mean the same thing when he calls her one?
@The Fan's Attic: I like how Obama is the only politician who is expected to meticulously delineate his policies when he gives speeches.
"Why is he inspiring his supporters?!?! I wanna hear about how he plans to fix the economy, step by step!!!"
He has now cornered the redneck vote and the mesh shirt aficionado vote.
@OchentaYcinco: East Timor may have an opening soon.
What do you mean "Confederate dollars are not legal tender"?!?!
@TheStarterWife: See what else is in his banner? A sleeveless t-shirt and hulking biceps.
John Rocker likes roids. Oh, we found that out yesterday. Nevermind.
@UkraineNotWeak: You're Georgia public schools. Dumbass.
/Fixed
/John Rocker
Alex Rodriguez, along with 2 other teammates, was a part of this casual conversation [on how to correctly administer steroids].
Were these the two other guys?
@TheStarterWife: However, he refers to them as "organic protein snacks".
@1980 David Bowie From The Music Video Ashes To Ashes: Step 1) Increase Cheeze Doodle sales
Step 2)
Step 3) Profit.
@OchentaYcinco: You should actually look west, to the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia.
Don't paraphrase me, bro.
Of course he wants to set the record straight. Gays have AIDS.
@Tuffy: @OchentaYcinco: There are also people in wheelchairs. Thus proving he is a great guy.
@Coming Into The Game, ♪♪ ♪♪♪ #J23 - The Superstar Receiver,...:
Or Florexico? Oh come on, everybody knows it's Floruba...get it straight John!
The wood holding up that sign represents the only piece of wood the crowd hadn't ignited on someone's lawn the night before.
In a horse race starring pen jockies, lions, and Shaq, who wins?
@TheStarterWife: And an NYPD hat. Proving he dislikes terrorists, but is OK with police officers. Provided they aren't gay. But black is cool, he's totally cool with the blacks. (Points to girlfriend) See?
@TheStarterWife: However, he refers to them as "meals on wheels".
@OchentaYcinco:
We don't have a President, so we're out. Besides, as arguably the most multicultural country in the world, we probably have too many queers with AIDS to elect him.
John Rocker hates it when the media misremembers his coments.
@lisa: I'd be a lot more worried about Wiscanada if I were him.
@Tuffy: You never know when Chechnya will be looking.
@TheLou-Do: Stephen A. must be angling for VP so he can run in 2016 with Isiah.
@1980 David Bowie From The Music Video Ashes To Ashes: I feel like that last time somebody motivated a large group of people George W. Bush was elected. Perhaps our elections need a little more scrutiny.
@The Fan's Attic: Yeah, but Obama's like waaaaay smarter.
Rocker/Hardaway in 2012. They may not see eye-to-eye on color, but I'm sure there are other things they can build a platform around.