Deadspin
FanIQ uncovers an old set of "Topps Kids" baseball cards from 1992 that probably wouldn't fly today: It looks like every player is on steroids. Even poor Ozzie Smith!
Yep, big heads, ripped muscles, imperceptible testicles ... those look like steroid users to us.
And hey, all you Pirates fans who have been frustrated that Barry Bonds waited until after he left your team to take steroids — and become pretty much the greatest hitter of all time — can take heed: In these cards, Barry's all roided up in the Pittsburgh uniform. So you have that.
Comments
Ariel Benson may have a copyright infringement case in her lap soon.
[deadspin.com]
Bonds' package looks a little too big there.
If Barry's head were a little larger that card could be a twin of his 2001 card.
The makers of "Ken Griffey Jr. Baseball" for the SNES obviously took inspiration from these cards.
The Lenny Dykstra one is actual size.
Topps Kids was a great marketing tool for pedophiles.
"Do you like go-karts?"
"No."
"Sure you do. Everyone likes go-karts."
@Thrillhouse: Best game ever.
They removed the Ryne Sandberg one because the artist made his shoes of concrete.
/still pissed about RS in HoF
That's not illegal, Ozzie is just all up ons.
I think the bat on the Bonds' card just called me a Fuck Face!
@Al Czerviks Ride to Denver via Albany: Joe Morgan posts on Deadspin?
Donruss Diamond Kings pretty much predicted the Bad Painting Era.
Are those stink lines and and fart cloud behind Bonds?
I thought Ozzie fell into the Mystery Spot in Springfield in 1992?
Nice tits.
Somehow Jack Clark back there in LF managed to miss the steroids truck.
i just got back from the "torch relay" in SF, it was fucking bullshit.
Topps luv the kids.
/Trick Daddy
@mfdoom: The real torch relay was in the Haight. A hippie trailed a lit joint behind him from Stanyan to Fillmore.
@Gourmet Spud: Have you ever seen his Garbage Pail Kid card?
[www.gotneed.com]
@Weed Against Speed:
Outstanding. I'll trade you for a Jesse Palmer rookie:
[www.geocities.com]
@Weed Against Speed:
Apparently, I can't work the internet. It wasn't that funny anyway.
@Jefferson Short Bus: actually, theyre running it towards the bridge i guess. but i catch your drift.
Reminds me of the big head code from the original NBA Jam.
I remember having these cards, I had the Ozzie one
It's only appropriate that everything below the waist is still very small.
Do you think the Ron Karkovice Topps Kids animation has pockmarks all over its cartoon back?
Will those be in Canseco's next book as "proof" of how many guys were juicing?
I think Oscar Gamble's fro was on roids
@Al Czerviks Ride to Denver via Albany: yeah, ole concrete sandberg and his 344 career stolen bases. what a statue he was.
@Al Czerviks Ride to Denver via Albany: "Hall of Famer" Gary Carter even thinks "Hall of Famer" Ryne Sandberg is suspect.
I found Griffey's card...
[nbadraft.net]
Honus was a raging abuser
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