ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ...
• "After a demoralizing loss at home, Philly has to fly to D.C. and play an away game within 24 hours." — slim 89
Previous ESPN Featured Comment of the Day, plus a Featured Deadspin Response or two ...
• "Paul is my MVP choice, but he won't win it quite yet." — enchoffman
• Paul Pierce is my MVP choice. Boston this, Boston that, Redsox, Patriots, I was talking to my dad, Jimmy Kimmell and I.... —BillSimmons — Sucko-T
• From Enchoffman profile: Never Question my fanhood! Ok. — The Fan's Attic









Comments
I don't know about you, but that two hour trip down 95 in my Accord always exhausts the shit out of me.
After a demoralizing post of his bone, Holmes uttered, "Scrate up Bitch."
"After a completely mundane thought, I have to sit down at my computer and share it with everyone within 24 minutes."
--Slimbrains_89
Yea...because Washington DC is one helluva a hockey town, shit dick.
@ArkansasFred: The two minute walk to the candy machine exhausts the shit out of me.
"After a demoralizing loss at home, DeShawn has to fly to D.C. and play a humilating home game within 48 hours." - SzczerbiakAttack!
not to mention the jet lag
Sounds like Jack Bauer is being demoted this season.
after coming into work, I have to deal with eight demoralizing hours of blabber.
I say things that happen -- slim 89
After a demoralizing episode of The War at Home, Michael Rappaport realizes that his life has never had any meaning.
"After a demoralizing loss of a girlfried, Peter has to fly to Hawaii and see her with her new Guy." - WeAreSarahMarshall
ESPN Commentors Present: The Story Behind The Schedule.
"If you are only reading the schedule, you are only getting half the story." - slim 89
Little does slim89 know that the Flyers, despite their name, only travel by hovercraft.
In slim_89 Words...
I see fans young and old eating up the marketing of players, past and present.
It doesn't matter whether it is the NFL, NBA, NHL, or MLB the player not the team seems to be paramount. To a certain extent you find the same thing in college sports nowadays with the hoopla over the Heishman and Draft Day. Sports have gone to the individual not the team.
The irony is the team will continue to exist, the players will come and go.
Should have just posted that instead.
"After a demoralizing beatdown at home, Tina Turner has to tour with Ike for the next six months." --cantrememberthegoddamnwords
After another demoralizing sexual experience, slim 89 has to go home to his parent's basement and wack off within 24 hours.
In other news I consider interesting, it's a sunny day today, and I plan to have casserole for dinner. -slim 89
After a demoralizing loss at home, the Philadelphia Flyers have to play a hockey game at the Washington Capitals homesite because due to the way seeding and home ice advantage work in the NHL playoffs, at seventh game is to be played at the higher seed's rink, rather than the lower seed's rink. The Washington Capitals are said higher seed, with Philadelphia being the lower seed. Do you understand people?- Iknowshowseedingworks
@ArkansasFred: Holy shit! That was lifted from GSTF, wasn't it?
But playing the Nationals should help any team. Even the Flyers.
I'm pretty sure slim 89 is just plagiarizing the info button on my cable remote.
Actually since I can't find it on TV, ESPN's featured comment has been my source for hockey news all season. So thanks Slim.
...the hoopla over the Heishman and Draft Day...
It's hard to take you seriously when you spell things like that, slim 89.
"Its not about mastering the game, but A mastering of yourself" - Slim_89
After one home game, the team had to play an away game. Seriously. it happened. Look it up. I know it's hard to believe, but a sports team faces an away game after a home game. Gary Bettman, how dare you impose that sort of demanding schedule.
"After a night of stripping, Kristin has to take the train to D.C. and play an away game in 24 hours." --Client9
After a demoralizing loss of foul ball, that asshole at Fenway has to get made fun of on the Internet for 24 hours before everyone forgets about him.
"After a demoralizing loss at home, O.J. has to drive with A.C. and play a runaway game with the LAPD." - glovefitsslim
@How do you spell retard?: It sounds even better when you read it in Chris Wheeler's voice.
I always dreamed of being a reporter that knows how to read schedules. -- slim 89
@Carlton_Whitfield: He didnt misspell it. The Heishman is the award given to the best Jewish college football player...or is that the Fleischman?
"I have studied the MLB schedule and determined that when the team from Philadelphia plays in Washington DC, it is considered an away game for them. Also, this game will begin within one day of them completing their previous game, which took place in Philadelphia." -- slimchanceimnotretarded89
After making dipshit comments, slim 89 will probably masterbate to femalemuscle.com within 24 hours.
@stjoehawk: Or Sarge Matthews, as well!
"After a demoralizing loss at home, Philly now has to step through the fog and creep through the smog.
-SlimWithTheTiltedBrim
"After a demoralizing loss to David and the Gnomes, Pit, Pat, Pot and Holler have to flee the forest and stay in their cave until it's dark again." -- nickelodeon 89
I like the current featured comment even better:
If you don't want OSU in the BCS game, make sure your team doesn't lose more games.
Once again, fate deals philly the ultimate cruelty: traveling for an away game.
@BigJimSlade: MastUrbate... jerkoff.
"after breakfast I have lunch and then dinner."
After a demoralizing loss at home, Germany has to storm into Poland and play an away game within 24 years. - LovesBlitzkreig'sList
@LosOsosdeChicago: Hey now, The Nats could hold the Flyers to 3 runs. Probably.
"After a thrilling victory on the road, D.C has to fly to Philly and play a home game within 24 hours." - slim 69
From the slim_89 page: "Its not about mastering the game, but A mastering of yourself"
Really? I don't even think that is correctly written...
"After a demoralizing 38 years of no sex, A.C. Green is flying on his honeymoon to play with his wife for the next 24 hours." --virgin89
"After a flattering photo of him appeared on the internet, Santonio Holmes has to fly to D.C. and play with his 24 inches alone."
- 24hrsltrstillhumbleddude
Slim 89 is actually just an RSS feed from Simon Gagne's Outlook calendar.
"Philly has to fly to D.C."
Really? The whole city? Shit, I'd better get cracking on those plane tickets!
/synecdoche-impaired
After a demoralizing loss at home, Benoit has no alternative than to take his own life within 24 hours.
"After a moralizing win on the road, the Caps has to fly to D.C. and play a home game within 24 hours." - dim 69
"After a demoralizing loss at home, Jackie Kennedy had to fly to D.C. and move out of the White House within 24 hours."--grassyknoll63
@Hit Bull Win Steak:
No no, that's the Heismanischewitz
@racistmascot_inc: X gets the square.
*have, not has
After a demoralizing loss at work, I have to drive back to work and contribute to a comedy pyramid in 24 hours.
"Uh, let's see. It looks like, um, the Caps are playing the Flyers tonight, and, uh, Minnesota will play Colorado. And then the winners will play some other teams in the next round, or something." -- slim 89
@LosOsosdeChicago: SteakGrowsonDmitri: tha fucks a flyer
@UkraineNotWeak:
I was trying to think of a Kennedy joke, I think you found the best way to do it.
"After a demoralizing set of chores at home, Cinderella has to ride in a pumpkin to the ball and leave before midnight." - gusgusonthebusbus
@UkraineNotWeak: +1 that's messed up, but I like.
After a demoralizing loss against Mothra, Godzilla has to fly to Monster Island and fight Megalon within 24 hours. -Slim-san 89
@slim 89 : -1
After a demoralizing loss to GHWB at home, Saddam only had ten years years to recover before another even more demoralizing loss at home to his idiot son.
--DcheneyUberalles
After a demoralizing loss to the Ultimate Warrior, the Macho Man has to crash a Shakespeare performance and snap into it! --slim jim 89
Demoralizing loss at home, Washington D.C.: Sounds like a typical day for the Nationals.
I don't have shit on slim 89! - Captain Obvious
"After a demoralizing loss in Pennsylvania, (Hillary Clinton/Barack Obama) has to fly to North Carolina and resume campaigning within 24 hours." --slimmarginofvictory08