Deadspin
Hey, when's a better time to take a look at John Madden in these rankings than the beginning of May? We can't think of a more apt moment in time.
Our favorite anecdote about John Madden is that, in the days after 9/11 when no one could fly, Madden was riding around the country with Peggy Fleming. That story boggles our mind. Of course, the reason Madden doesn't fly is because of a crash involving players at his alma mater Cal Poly in 1960. (Though he did fly until 1979, when he had a panic attack on a flight. We know he feels; when one of the stations on JetBlue isn't working, we lose our freaking mind.)
We love this shot of Madden; we forget he didn't always look so old.
By the way, this vote is for Madden himself, not Frank Caliendo's impersonation of Madden.
So: Do you like the John Madden? Do you not like the John Madden? Let's hear it.
Comments
Talk about your dumbing down of society. This guy has singlehandedly wasted millions of hours of people's time on his videogame.
Disapprove.
He made my career.
Approve.
-F. Caliendo
See this button right here? I'm gonna check the "Disapprove" circle, then BOOM, I'm gonna click on the "Vote" button. See, now the Deadspin servers are gonna add one more vote to the "Disapprove" column.
That picture. It's like he's busting through my head and into my nightmares.
Approve, because if it weren't for him, I wouldn't know when to put a little more touch on the ball.
Meh.
Approve.
should have hung it up a while ago but has incredible video game and signature style. Berman has been ripping him off for years
I had that original computer game. Things have some a long way since then, haven't they?
/dick joke
who the crap is peggy fleming
approve anyway
Well, Brett Favre is the only Brett Favre, because he is Brett Favre, and no one else can be Brett Favre with Brett Favre on the field. And I'll say this, when Brett Favre plays like Brett Farve, then you know it's Brett Favre playing...BOOM.
J. Madden.
This is why I approve.
Disapprove. The turducken is an unholy crime against nature and all that's sane and reasonable.
Approve. Boom!
Big approve. Drafting and developing top-flight wide recievers for the Phildelphia Eagles got me through some tough times.
His does draw a decent penis on the telestrater.
"According to the Sentinels, it says Ray Smith is -- hey, that's weird. No college given, no high school. It just says he's been a resident of the state of Maryland for the last two years and two months, and that he likes to embroider."
Approve.
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A classic piece of sports literature.
I just want to know what could John Madden and Peggy Fleming possibly talk about during all those hours together on the Madden Cruiser? I'm just guessing that Peggy locked herself in the bedroom of the Cruiser for the duration of the trip.
Approve. I learned everything I know about football from him and Pat Summerall's corpse.
[www.night-lab.com]
Approve
@ArkansasFred: That's why I approved, for introducing to America such a tasty and confounding addition to this nation's dinner tables.
We also forget he didn't always look so fat. He looks like a 40-something George Gaines.
Approve.
Also, if you take binoculars to a game and look into the announcing booth, Madden will be eating the entire game.
Approve. The guy can make a good videogame.
Approve for the same reasons for which I approve of Dickie V: loves the sport, their enthusiasm is good for the game, but they can be pretty damn annoying on TV sometimes.
What is the difference between him and Frank Caliendo's impersonation of him? I approve of both.
Stuffed inside of John Madden is a whole boneless Dan Dierdorf.
Approve, I never really felt football was violent enough until he had the Ambulance come on the field to take away injured players.
About time to put him out to pasture, I'd say. Disapprove.
@UkraineNotWeak: So long as Madden had access to the galley and the shitter, I'm sure that wasn't a problem.
@Stev D: The entire duration of the game or eating the game itself, pylons and all?
Only Forrest Gump has accomplished more with a 72 IQ.
Approve
You're right, that picture doesn't make him look old, just a lot like a lesbian.
Can we please get all the Favre fellatio jokes out of the way please?
@EDogII:
Thank you.
I overused please in a vain attempt.
I love playing Madden. Unfortunately for me, I loved playing it on my PC. No Madden '09 for the PC for me, no "Approve" vote for you, Mr. Madden.
he's more like an NFL Mascot, a grandfatherly figure there to make you "feel" the spirit of the NFL.
I don't judge Madden like I do a regular analyst, just cause he's there to be John Madden and say Madden things.
@Doyle McPoyle: His shirt looks like it's made of fruit roll-ups.
Approve for the old Miller Lite ads.
How could anyone be against the circling of ass sweat on national TV?
@EditorOfTheDailyFaberian: There's a man at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW who would beg to differ.
@ArkansasFred: Also, check his right arm...is he tying off? John Madden's Trainspotting?
and come on who doesn't miss the mutant 8 legged turkey on Thanksgiving?
I have no research to back this up, but I'm going to say that the video games were not his idea. His announcing is only slightly less annoying in the games than in real life, too.
disapprove. completely.
"Now in the offensive line you've got your a-hole and your b-hole. On this play, he's trying to penetrate the a-hole."
Approve.
100% approve. You know we'd be worse off as a society without him.
John Madden and Judge Alvin Valkenheiser: separated at birth:
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Favorite Madden moment? When he telestrated the direction of the three rivers in Pittsburgh. Apparently there is a big drain in the middle.
One of Oakland's finest, only being surpassed by Jerry Brown, Hangin' With Mr. Cooper and Oaktown 357. Approve
They don't make 'em like this anymore. Definitely approve.
+ Watch video
Approve. Old enough to remember when he started broadcasting. It might be shtick, but it was always him, and original at the time. NBC's #1 team at the time? Dick Enberg and Merlin Olsen. Madden made it fun.
He does a really good job on the forecheck and clogs up the neutral zone, which, while good for the Devils really bores the shit out of those of us watching at home. Wait, what?
@Sir Hotbod Handsomeface:
blasphemous! It was his idea, and he programmed and designed every one of them until 2000 when he decided it was cutting into his job as President too much
@Dany Heatley Speedwagon:
Don Cherry > John Madden, only because of the quality/hilariousness of his suits.
Should have retired from the booth 10 years ago. I'm shocked that Al Davis hasn't tried to hire him back.
Approve solely for the old Miller lite ads.
Approve, as long as I don't actually have to look at him anymore. His eyebrows freak me out.
Yeah, he sounds dumb as hell sometimes, but the guy has forgotten more football than I'll ever learn.
As a coach, as a color analyst, as the face of a legendary video game: Approve.
Madden Jinx >> SI Jinx.
Approve.
@Dead Wrestlers Society: Good Lord...all that needed was Howard Cosell welcoming you back to Three Rivers Stadium. Wunnerful!!! +1 anna spare.
@ArkansasFred: You then, would not have fit in very well with the 19th Century French Noble Class. They set the modern day record by stuffing a bustard with a turkey, a goose, a pheasant, a chicken, a duck, a guinea fowl, a teal, a woodcock, a partridge, a plover, a lapwing, a quail, a thrush, a lark, an Ortolan Bunting and a Garden Warbler.
@Baudolino: Oh, and approve.
The guy swung from Brett Favre's nuts for 16 years. Approve, I guess.
A more publicly loved football version of Tim McCarver.
Disapprove.
He brought Turducken to the mainstream.
APPROVE!
@Jefferson Short Bus:
yeah and the reason I don't like Berman is because he's not that person we see on camera....Madden is Madden 100%.
@Thundercracker:
His complete inability to communicate and his constant eating also make him seem a lot like the stereotypical video game programmer.
For awhile he also served as co-leader of Delta Force with Chuck Norris.
But he is a windbag...Disapprove.