Deadspin
We're taking a couple more days off at the end of this week — Friday's a half day anyway, and the whole site is taking Memorial Day off — so we're using to do something we've never done before: We're going to Europe. Actually, we're going to France. Yes, yes, we know: Everybody point and laugh.
In about an hour, we'll be on a plane to Paris, where we will attempt to pronounce "Où montrent-ils aux cardinaux le jeu?" (Roughly translated from "Where are they showing the Cardinals game?") We don't speak any French, we don't know anything about France and you can't even smoke inside anymore. We'll try to keep ourselves busy.
Mssgrs. Daulerio and Chandler will be here to take you through the rest of the week. We'll be back Tuesday morning. If we could grow facial hair, we'd be sporting a goatee, but you all know that isn't possible. We just hope we run into this guy.
Comments
Au revoir!
Check out the Centre Pompidou and the sculpture outside it. You can't handle that shit on strong acid.
Also, hang out in Place de la Tertre and the rest of Montmartre.
Look! It's the French David Stern... how far you have fallen!
I think you're full of bourgeois.
DISAPPROVE.
do nothing for food except buy cheap wine, cheese and bread. If you're feeling lazy, get the jambon et fromage or a nutella and banana crepe on the street. Remember, the dollar sucks these days. Also, prices on hard liquor/cocktails, if they even exist, will be ridiculous, even for a new yorker.
Musée d'Orsay. And just let yourself wander around and eat in some little café or braisserie.
Nice hat, Leyland.
Whatever you do, keep your girlfriend away from Louis Vuitton--esp if youre buying!
We eat babies!
We drink pee!
We are French, French, French!
Well that's the best picture I've seen today.
Why is there a picture of Hideki Irabu with this post?
wicked jealous - have a great time!
france just faxed over its proposed terms of surrender
Look at 'ze bangs on 'ze American! Hoh-hoh-hoh-hoh-hoh!
Congratulations on winning "Pig In A Poke."
/Oink Oink my good man.
Soup du jour!
Camembert!
Jacques Cousteau!
Baguette!
L'Hotel des Invalides. It's not what you think. Well it's French art but still.
I liked Lyon better than Paris. Less attitude, better food.
@econdave: Seconded. Aside from the Nike of Samothrace, which is magnificent, Musée d'Orsay > The Louvre.
Enjoy the Euro exchange, I got murdered in Italy back in February, which was my first time in Europe as well.
Seriously though, enjoy filling the ol' passport with stamps. Also, enjoy easting some snails.
@Arriaga_II: +un.
Bring lots of Euros, Will. Our $ is the new peso.
@Carl Everett's Fossil Collection: Then you didn't see this: [deadspin.com]
Have fun, Will. Bring us back something fun.
Drogba: Oops. I are stupids.
@Clare: Jesus, grumpy, the man's going to Europe for the first time. Be nice.
Have fun en la France, Papa de la Semaine.
Drogba slappin' a ho.
Some other helpful phrases you should keep at the ready:
Où est la pénicilline?
Il est deux heures. Ayons un poste de travail boire.
Cet enfant est en état d'ébriété.
Must watch Everybody Loves Hypnotoad.
Drogba just got red-carded for smacking a ho (well, Vidic.)
@She Blinded Me With Violence: dammit.
THREADJACK
Drogba sent off for slapping Vidic
/THREADJACK
@Clare: Affirmed D'Orsay > Louvre
I especially enjoy Bordeaux and the Loire Valley. Normandy is spectacular as well, for different reasons
@She Blinded Me With Violence: The NBA: Where you can get away with slapping your opponent happens.
@She Blinded Me With Violence: No. No I did not.
Although a smoking, beret-wearing frog still amuses me so.
Don't forget to help out the robotmen trying to feed their robotfamilies.
+ Watch video
@Carl Everett's Fossil Collection: I blame this on Nibbles.
Bonjour, je suis Claude. J'ai un grande saucisse. T'aime mon saucisse?
/It earned me detention in 9th grade.
You probably won't make it down but the south of France is remarkable and not nearly as elitist as Paris.
Drogba is a seven year old girl.
Remember: "Chappeau" means "hat". "Oeuf" means "egg". It's like those French have a different word for everything.
God dammit this is going to penalty kicks. I wonder if ESPN understands this is a bad thing or if they're equating it overtime in American sports.
What's the big deal? I surrender to my external monkey 3 times a week or so
Agreed with Musee D'Orsay and L'Hotel des Invalides. Catch the boules players in Jardins du Luxembourg. I'm envious.
Will, be sure to sample the French language. I've heard it's especially fun to curse with. It's like wiping your ass with silk.
/sorry for referencing that awful sequel
//enjoy
We're taking a couple more days off at the end of this week...
You're what the French call "les incompetents".
Will, if you get a chance, I hear the Maginot Line tour is a lovely tribute to "It seemed like a good idea at the time..."
Since Channelsurfing.net doesn't want to work at my office today, and I'm DVRing ManU-Chelsea, should I be completely avoiding Deadspin for the remainder of the afternoon at all costs? Figured I'd check and see if people will actually threadjack with the final (whenever there is one).
@BigRicks: Yeah I'd be wary.
@feed_me_a_stray_cat: Really? Like, where? I would imagine that Cannes and Nice and Antibes are super-snooty.
Have fun Will, here's hoping you find your own Mr. Big there.
/Wait, what?
Be careful of any beautiful strangers who are somehow connected to an underworld culture of bloodthirsty werewolves. Trust me.
@BigRicks: People have been posting stuff across threads... I would avoid the comments if it isn't too late
@HockeyMountain: What's the big deal? I surrender to my external monkey 3 times a day or so
/fixed
/hangs head in shame
/needs to get laid
@SonOfSpam: Those people don't even have the courtesy to speak English.