• Sponsors

    You know she has that Scooby-Doo tongue.

    You see I don't, I don't work with any exact boundaries of the law because I wasn't consulted when the god damn laws were made. No, instead nameless, faceless politicians, the so called protectors of the moral majority decide what is right and what is wrong. I mean come on. I govern my life around my own personal code of ethics, and I suggest that you do the same. That way if, within the constructs of my own morality, I were to do something that is considered illegal, so be it. I feel no guilt whatsoever and furthermore, if I were to buckle under the social weight of the system by adhering to laws that I do not truly believe in then I would be extinguishing the very fire of patriotism and individuality. So in a sense, by having sex with Natasha, I'd be preserving the rights our forefathers fought and died for, right?

    If you would like to some day be a manager at Shenaniganz, then you have all the drive and initiative needed to be a Deadspin advertiser. Go here, to find out more.

    This week's overachievers:

    • Coors Light

    •; Hotflops

    • Puma

    • Starwood Hotels

    • T-Mobile

    • Unscrew America

    Loading comments ...