We're THIS close to having a new President, people. Four more days! Four more days! OK, I'm shutting this thing down, but not before we review what we've learned this week.

• Erin Andrews can tuck me in any time.

• Tonight, we're all Phillies fans ... except for that guy in the Padres hat. Let's get him!

• If this were Mayberry, John Daly would be Otis Campbell.

• Smear the queer!

• Despite Danyelle Sargent's valiant efforts, Bill Walsh still deceased

•. Mike Singletary can kill you with his thoughts.

Be safe out there tonight, citizens. And if you come across a pantsless Deadspin editor lying comatose in the street, please gently roll him to the curb. And feel free to take his wallet and shoes for your trouble.

video: Crashburn Alley

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