• Who much can you bench?: A gym in London allows members to bench press humans. So does a club in Vegas, but you have to pay extra for it. [Sports Rubbish]

• So soon?: The Winter Olympics are only 13 months away? Gee, does my hair look all right? [Gunaxin]

• Make 'em say "Ugghhh": Pau Gasol is either trying to draw a foul call or he's planning to join the women's tennis tour. [BWE]

• How about a set of bleachers?: Some of the wild and wacky stadiums designs that are taking over our planet. [Listicles]

• Polly want a red card?: Note to self: Don't bring your whistle happy pet parrot to soccer games anymore. [Slanch Report]

Send an email to Dashiell Bennett, the author of this post, at dashiell@deadspin.com.