• Panic at Needle Park: Roger Clemens injected himself inside Yankee Stadium?! That's disgusting! Why couldn't he shoot up in the bleachers like everyone else? [Why's My Head Growing?]

• And my Prince Fielder rookie doesn't fit on my screen: Wow, 3-D baseball cards. So now my entire childhood investment portfolio is worthless in multiple dimensions. [Endgadget]

• If you make any Brady Quinn jokes, they better be hilarious: Meet the 2009 Cleveland Browns, also known as the 2008 New York Jets. [WaitingForNextYear]

• Spoiler alert: Here's some more conference tournaments previews for those who are interested. Don't tell me what happens! [Pac 10 and Big 12 @ Baseline Stats]

• They know he's a catcher right?: A new blog is dedicated itself to ridding the Minnesota Twins of their only marketable (and irreplaceable) asset. That should fix everything. [Trade Mauer]

Send an email to Dashiell Bennett, the author of this post, at dashiell@deadspin.com.