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Barry Zito Controls The Universe

Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to tips@deadspin.com. Subject: Morning crap

Here we have Giants ludicrously expensive starter Barry Zito showing off his ability to project gallons of mucus from his nose with his mind. This is also how he communicates with catcher Bengie Molina about what pitches to throw. Left side snot rocket equals curve ball, right side equals fastball. This also helps overcome the language barrier.

It didn't help on Friday night as Zito once again gave up four runs in four innings and looked nothing closely resembling the shutdown ace the Giants thought they were purchasing. No, instead he appeared more like the man who uses his Twitter for fart jokes.

******

Good morning. It's Easter Sunday, so since I'm a lapsed Catholic, this place will be pretty barren for most of the day. (Or as the Molinas call it, "inocupado.") But it is the only day the "Gay As Easter" tag can be used to generate Google traffic. So you'll see that a lot. Anyway because it's Easter, gayness is a virtue and, in my opinion, if there is one band which embodies all that is gay and virtuous it's Journey. No, not the new Journey with the Filipino karaoke singer, the real one, with Steve Perry and lots of tight Levis.

Happy Easter:


Send an email to A.J. Daulerio, the author of this post, at ajd@deadspin.com.


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