Some things of varying importance that need to be addressed. So DUAN seems the most appropriate post to do so since I've already lost your attention until tomorrow morning. It's time to purge.
• Twitter: Yes, Sports Fella dissed the Big Lead. Saw it. Weird. More gratifying? Anna Benson. She requests that Deadspin not to say mean things about her. Please follow here instructions. She owns a gun. Don't say things like, "If you decide to fuck anyone else on the Rangers besides your husband, please don't let it be Vicente Padilla. He's crazy and will probably cut off your giant fake breasts with a machete while you sleep." So, yeah: Welcome, Anna Benson.
• More About Sports Fella: Yes. I tagged along with Emeritus to meet Bill Simmons while he was in town for the Tribeca Film Festival. Yes, I lost my iPhone that evening. I don't blame the Sports Fella. No, I blame former MTV News anchor Chris Connelly, who was also there. I was much more excited to meet him than Bill Simmons. Why? Because I'm fucking old. Also? Chris Connelly did not kill Tupac. I believe I asked him that. Twice. How are we doing so far?
• More About Twitter: Andy Hutchins, proprietor of The Arena blog, is the Royal We for Deadspin Twitter. He's young and full of verve and zest and zeal and all of those other characteristics needed for good Tweeting. So if you see something messed up on Twitter coming from Deadspin, it's his fault. (Just kidding. He's a doing a fine job. I hope.) RT The Shit out of him, whatever that means. Once I get a new iPhone, I will also be adding my four words of wisdom to this thing. You think the typos are bad on Deadspin now? You should see me text on iPhone. I'd have better luck typing with my face. So you have that to look forward to.
• Blogs With Balls: This is an event on June 13th in New York where many people with sports blog affiliations will gather to talk about what it's like to be a professional sports blogger. There will be panels. Discussions about SEO strategies. Meet-and-greets. Trust falls. Beer. Ecstasy.Sarah Spain water slides. Dan Shanoff tilt-a-whirls. Michael Tunison giraffe orgies . It's like Circus Of The Fucking Sports Blogging Stars. And it's only $49. Buy lotsa tickets and come kick your favorite sports blogger in the shins. It looks like a splendid event.
• Tommy Craggs is the new full-time Deadspin writer: He starts Monday. He's in Korea now visiting his family. He's going to be excellent. No, he's not related to the person in the Jeopardy! photo you see above. But he could be...because he's smart.
• Changes: Oh, right. There will be another Very Special Guest Editor this Friday. I'll make another announcement tomorrow to remind you of this. Please treat this person as warmly as you did Moe. Who's excited for Friday?
•: What else?: Oh. Right. Colleen:
Hi, I'm sorry to bother you guys, but I'm not sure if I'm having a problem with Deadspin right now. The last blog post I see on the front was from 5:30 PM today. Was that the last one you posted or were there more?
I really want to read the other blogs after that time and especially DU!AN. If you could answer my question, I would most appreciate it.
HOLD THE FUCK ON, YOU WICKED WOMAN. God. Lemme collect my fucking thoughts for once. Sheesh. Anyway....
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Meeting adjourned.