This Column Must Register With The Local Authorities

Alfred Luckerbauer. You might have missed this over the weekend, but Daulerio and I both received emails Friday night from a man named Alfred Luckerbauer, who apparently is the email attack dog for Freddie Mitchell. I'm not sure why Mitchell would need a protector from Deadspin — which is literally the only place that ever writes about Freddie Mitchell — but I love how much information Daulerio found out about him, including his awesome personal Web site. Money quote: "Would YOU like to improve anything in your life ? More Money? Better Health and more Energy? Maybe spend more time with friends and family or have time and money for your favorite activity........YOUR DREAMS ?" Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! To all those questions! I would love to have time and money for my favorite activity with is MY DREAMS. I would love to subscribe to your newsletter.