The One Where Tim Tebow Gets Cornholed

We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another.

It's usually because they're just so absurd or really lack even the most tenuous of news angles to give them the go-ahead. Other times it's because they're just absolute horseshit. But every Friday until we get sick of running them, we'll present to you some of these not-so-shiny gems. All items should be treated as [Sic'd]. Enjoy...

Mike Vick Also Don't Use Helping Verbs

A friend of mine went to Va Tech at the same time as Michael Vick. Anyways she arrives at a party and sees some of the football players and then saw Michael Vick talking to a lady. They end up dancing for a little bit and then she goes in for a kiss. Vick gives her the Heisman and says "Mike Vick don't kiss, Mike Vick just fuck".

Even FJM Has Its Haters

The "X" logo thing stopped being clever at 9:45 a.m. EST.

Why so much self-referencing stuff? Are you under the impression you have a cult following? You don't. I get the jokes, and they're still not funny.

THE TOPIC OF SPORTS IS MORE INTERESTING THAN THE TOPIC OF YOU.

Please hesitate to do this again in the future. I'd way rather have Mo instead.

Fire yourselves, not Joe Morgan.

And More

It's great to see that the fire Joe Morgan losers are able to get some time off from their temp jobs and working the counter at starbucks. What exactly do they do when they're all in same room, talk fantasy sports, dungeons and dragons, compare notes on what they think it will be like when one of them actually kisses a girl ?

Joe

Me: Your ire is slipping!

Joe:

LOL, I think I hit a nerve. Those dudes have about as much of chance of becoming tv writers as Bill Simmons

Your Commenting Abilities Have Been Put On Notice

I dont get the comment section on your site. Is it a place where your loyal users can comment on the related article and have discussion? Or some vessel for unemployed factory workers to try their hand at witty humor? The comment section is a complete waste, your regular troupe of losers try to out-do eachothers obscure pop reference or utter randomness posing as humor. Its a poor mans version of a snickers candy bar commercial, they have the credibility of a washed up athelete, you have nameless internet wanks who think theyre Seth McFarlane. Get this idea of your comment section being fresh and innovative out of your head. Regular users cannot participate, which thwarts any chances of users return. Its stupid, and apparently so are you.

Sincerely,

Not dumb enough to comment.

Imitation Is The Sincerest Form Of Flattery And Deep-Seated Psychosis

Dashiell,

I wanted to personally apologize to you. While in Atlantic City this weekend a woman asked me what I did for a living. Unable to admit that I do crappy marketing I told her that I was a writer for Deadspin, figuring she would have no idea what that meant, and think I was a tool for smugly dropping a name. She actually did know Deadspin, and asked what my name was. Seeing as how like one picture exists of you in the internet, I said you. She got really excited and called her friend over. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to steal your identity. If it makes you feel any better, I found out minutes later that she was 40 (I'm 25) and had two kids back home. Sorry.

Oh, and for some reason this woman might think you are lightweight drinker. Sorry again.

Elliott

I'm Sorry You Have Still Not Gotten Over This

AJ and Will -

A friend of mine forwarded me your coverage of Mark Whicker's piece regarding Jaycee Dugard. It is difficult to overstate how rediculous you both look in light of AJ's now infamous Cultural Oddsmaker article making fun of Chris Benoit's murder-suicide of his wife and mentally retarded son.

Duplicitous does not seem to cover it.

Perhaps AJ you could direct Tommy over to your earlier piece before he hands the title of "worst piece of sports journalism ever committed to page" over so easily.

At least Mr. Whicker had the decency to run a public apology. — BJP

The Origins Of A Name: He Actually Thought It Was Pronounced "ESS-PIN"

From: Nick Denton: this is what I sent over to Patric for Deadspin logo

The One Where Tim Tebow Gets Cornholed

Tim Tebow Cornhole Photo Courtesy Of Reader Grayson G.