Some of you who follow my infrequently updated Twitter account may have seen a report from a friend about a video of two people doing the North Texas rumpy-pump in the bathroom at the MNF game. It has arrived. (NSFW)
Don't be too alarmed — it's only three seconds of pretty standard grunt-heavy missionary sex on the bathroom floor, nabbed by this citizen journalist who, along with many others at Dallas Stadium last night, witnessed this display. My friend, who was at the game, said many Cowboys fans were startled by the odd noises coming from the Hall of Fame box level bathroom stall, where a couple clad in Michael Irvin jerseys were "totally banging" at the end of the 4th quarter when the Cowboys had pretty much wrapped it up. The commotion soon became very, very public and many fans equipped with cellphone cameras ran into the stall to snap pictures. Luckily, our guy had video and stuck his hand over the stall like a true professional voyeur and caught a a few mighty thrusts during Irvin on Irvin.
After the couple was finished (my friend says this was done via hand, for some reason — so old school) the two people walked out from the bathroom and were greeted by raucous applause. One onlooker yelled "See you on YouTube!" and the happy man graciously replied "Bring it on!" Of course he did.
Now, whether Jerry Jones will take it upon himself to fuck-proof the roomy Hall of Fame bathroom stalls from here on out is yet to be seen, but since he has Cowboys cage dancers and plenty of other carnival-like attractions going on, a little public fornication probably won't faze him too much.
Dallas Cowboy Stadium, ladies and gentlemen — fun for the whole family.