Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.
•The whole point of having bowl games in the South is to ensure warm weather, right? Well, warm-weather Georgia Tech's offense struggled in 40-degree temperatures, as Iowa took the Orange Bowl for their first major bowl win in 51 years. But forget all that, there's one game left that really matters: tonight's GMAC Bowl, of course.
•The US broke a five-year Canadian streak, and won the world hockey juniors on an overtime goal. Judging from the 6-5 score, the future of hockey looks bright. Unless you value non-European goalies.
•Randy Johnson calls it quits after 22 years, and the countdown to Cooperstown begins. The only question is will he go in as an Expo, and Astro or a Giant?
•Gilbert Arenas got the Wizards fired up before last night's game by...making guns with his fingers and pretending to shoot his teammates. No word if Javaris Crittenton then tried to do the same with a make-believe bazooka.
•The Nets and the Bucks played a game, I guess, and maybe one of them won or something. But the real news was Brandon Jennings kicking it old school, with the Kid 'n Play hair.
The gang will be along shortly. Until then, I leave you with the only band that never recorded a bad song.