We Wanted A Game; We Got A Circus

Trick plays, failed trick plays, and a freshman QB thrust into the spotlight. Let's take a look at the storylines and screengrabs of the night.

It could have been one of the greatest sports stories ever. Star QB goes down, and untested freshmen steps in to lead his team to glory. Except the Matt Saracen role for Texas was played by...

Garrett Gilbert, the gawky 18-year-old. Should I be the one to say it? That instead of running up the score, Mack Brown should've gotten his backup QB some reps this year?

Alabama had a little secret on their sidelines. (Thanks to reader Patrick)

Balloon penis hat? Balloon penis hat. (Thanks to reader Ryan)

Actual quote: "A Cole Porter classic originally recorded in the Blues style. Now here's the Bette Midler version..."

In perhaps the game's most exciting moment, noted rudo El Guapo Oro made an unscheduled appearance on the field.

Greg McElroy went prospecting for gold. He would end up with a crystal egg. (Thanks to reader Matt)

At first Gilbert looked like this.

Then his voice dropped two octaves, his balls dropped two feet, and he threw two TDs to bring it back within three.

The comeback visibly excited an unknown Texas coach. (Thanks to reader Derek)

But a key fumble ended all hopes of a Disney move based on Garrett Gilbert. He also threw four INTs.

Mark Ingram finished that sucker off, rushing for 116 yards and 2 scores — and the game's offensive MVP award. That's what a Heisman winner should do.

And that was that. Would the game have played out different with Colt McCoy in there? Sure. But let's not forget that the Texas defense, which supposedly carried the load, gave up 37 points. Congrats to Alabama. Now bring on Boise State?