Ron Artest's Hair Odyssey

His rebounds and steals per game are down for the year. But Ron Artest still means defense! Or at least he's gotten it dyed in his newly-platinum hair, in three different languages. He thinks that's what it says, anyway.

Artest, no stranger to "creative" hairstyles, chose a new look last night: Lakers purple and gold. Here's the gold:

Ron Artest's Hair Odyssey

But his Dennis Rodman tribute, as he put it, was just beginning. He decided he needed "defense" written on his head, in Japanese, Hebrew and Hindi.

There are right ways and wrong ways to go about learning how to write something in a foreign language before you put it on your body. The second-worst way is to ask people on Twitter.

Ron Artest's Hair Odyssey

We'll assume that by "India" he means Hindi. Oh, and the worst way to learn how to write it? Search the internet. (We'll assume that by "Hindu" in his Google search tab, he again means Hindi.)

We are ugly Americans, and can't read any other languages. But if any of you can proofread Ron's hair, and tell us if he got these right, we'll be happily indebted.