America is a house divided thanks to Tony Kornheiser and Lance Armstrong's "car vs. bike" stand off, but thankfully radio executives have issued strict orders for everyone on their air to shut the hell up about it.
For those of you not following your radio host-cyclist feud news, Tony Kornheiser recently said out loud on his radio show that people with cars should run people on bikes off the road. (This is part of the age-old debate between drivers and cyclists that can only end in bloodsport.) Naturally, Lance Armstrong—being the world's most famous pedalist—responded in kind (about a week later) by calling Tony a "punk ass chump" and a "douchebag" and urging his Twitter followers to complain. I guess people can still get upset by obnoxious radio hosts being intentionally obnoxious.
But in an odd acknowledgment that this is indeed a stupid non-story, executives at Clear Channel (which probably owns any non-satellite radio station you've listened to in the last decade) put the kibosh on it as a topic of discussion. A tipster sent us the email, which was sent around to the talent this morning:
Subject: Cycling - IMPORTANT
In light of Tony Kornheiser's comments, please be clear with your staff(s): With NO exceptions, our personalities should NOT engage in conversation or commentary about the world of cycling, professional or recreational. Please communicate clearly to our very talented on air personnel what is expected with this issue.
"Lance Armstrong will confront US radio talkshow host Tony Kornheiser today after the sports journalist recommended running riders down during an anti-cycling rant."
Thanks for your attention to this matter.
The two did make nice on Tony's show today, but it's sort of amusing that Lance Armstrong's righteous indignation about bicycling could help ensure that no one ever talks about the sport on the radio ever again. Which is fine, because those guys are always in my lane, amirite?!