Bill Byrne, athletic director at Texas A&M, made an embarrassing gaffe this week when he revealed himself to be a terribly old man who doesn't understand email. He should know by now that all internet threats are empty threats.

Apparently, some Aggie fans are a little miffed that the school didn't jump off the Big 12 ship and bolt for the SEC, because while their football team may not have fared any better there, at least they could leave the state once in awhile. They're also worried that the big bully over in Austin just got a lot a whole lot bigger and "Dollar Bill" himself appeared to be twiddling his thumbs while his conference nearly collapsed. (He was actually out of town last weekend for a family reunion, when the big deal went down.) He got many, many emails expressing frustration over the situation and one in particular caught his eye.

Hey assholes

I am a third generation aggie and class of '06. my family and I, including many extend family members have had season tickets at kyle field for up to 20 yrs.

We also tailgate spending a lot of time and money during the fall in college station. That all ended today

We are canceling our season tickets and will never again donate to the 12th man until there is all new board of regents minus Gene Stallings, a new ad, new president (that guy is a disgrace).

Dollar bill, I hope you have time to pull your tongue out of dodds butt to read this email

Sincere regards

Richard Rogge

After reading that email, Byrne immediately got on the horn to the sender, giving him his direct line at the athletic department offices and suggesting that "Rogge" deserved to have his "ass kicked." The implication being that Byrne, who is 65, (A MAN!) might be the one to deliver it. Instead of calling him back, the sender apparently chose to post the email and the phone call on an Aggie message board.

Was Bill Byrne completely unprofessional? (He apologized, naturally.) Of course. But is he any worse than a guy who starts of a poorly formatted email with "hey assholes"? I want to hear the phone conversation between the emailer and the AD. The one where he tells school officials off directly to their ears or sets up a face-to-face meeting so they can write the fan a check for his wounded Aggie Pride. In fact, I encourage more personal interaction between the tough guys of the internet and the tougher guys who still think beefs should be settled in the parking lot. Enough of the gutless name calling. Let's get it on!

Unless these interactions involve me. Because I never want to meet any of you people. Ever.

[Audio YouTubeified by Brooks]