Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day.
•Donald Fehr already ruined baseball, and now he's going to ruin hockey. I'm being hyperbolic, of course. No damage wreaked by the architect of the MLB strike can't be fixed (and then ruined again) by starting an NHL steroids culture.
•Has boxing no dignity remaining? Sorry, stupid question, I know. But after Antonio Margarito was caught with plaster in his hand wraps a year ago, you'd think it would've been tough to find a state so gung-ho to license him. Not so: Texas approved his application in three days, and he'll fight Manny Pacquiao at Cowboys Stadium in November.
•Albert Pujols becomes the third youngest man to 400 home runs, but the Cardinals manage a painful loss in 13 innings to the Nationals. Is that redundant? All losses in extra innings are painful. All losses to the Nationals are painful.
•Oh look, this'll be fun. Police are investigating reports that J.R. Smith choked another (non-NBA) player during a pickup game two weeks ago. If Carmelo is looking for a way out of Denver, this is probably an effective solution.
•Major League Baseball's crazy innovation of showing only the important plays in highlights has gotten them a lawsuit from the man who claims he thought it up. Sure buddy, you're the first to realize only about 2 minutes of actual action takes 3 hours to play out.
(Photo via Sports Pickle)
Okay, let's bring this one in for a landing.