John Salley Story Corner: Jacking It Won't Help Your Prostate

Every week, John Salley, onetime Bad Boy and currently the arachnoid half of the Spider and the Henchman podcast, will regale us with an amusing and occasionally salacious story from his playing days. Today: a therapeutic digression on the benefits of intercourse.

Ed note: No Spider Story per se this week. Instead we bring you Salley's advice on keeping your equipment in working order. Naturally, this segued from a discussion of nutritional supplements. The views expressed herein are Dr. Salley's and Dr. Salley's alone. Deadspin does not recommend you believe anything he says about the human prostate.

It's the intercourse, not the ejaculation, that's good for your prostate. When you're jerking off, you're not using the same muscles and you're not connecting the same way you would when you're inside a female. You're getting her energy as well. And you're using your whole body. Masturbation is like saying: "Well, I don't have to do pushups. I'll just push my arm forward." That whole transfer of energy with a female, that's the burning of calories. Because of what it does with the pituitary gland, it's going to make blood go to that area differently.

All you guys who masturbate a lot, let me just tell you: After a while, the blood swells around your prostate. You're sitting still and staying in the same position — it's not great for your prostate.

[Ed. note: Here, Hench disagrees with Spider Science and opines that masturbation is great for your prostate.]

That's if you're playing with your prostate while jacking off, which guys haven't gotten into.

Women, if you're jerking your boyfriend off, use two hands. Help him out. Squeeze the prostate and the head. And use your mouth.

The above is adapted from the "Spider Stories" segment on the Spider and the Henchman podcast. Follow John and his podcast on Twitter: @thejohnsalley and @spiderandhench. Subscribe on iTunes.