Pissed-Off Under Armour Employee Does Not Want To Work Full Friday After Auburn's Championship

The corporate higher-ups at Under Armour probably should've waited to mess with employee holiday schedules, what with the lingering championship afterglow and all. One employee decided to vent his displeasure in the form of an anonymous email. This is his championship, after all.

[Sic'd]

To Deadspin,
I work for Under Armour. Yeah, it's exciting. We're a young, fast-moving company. The company has an oft-reported story of how our 30-something CEO started the business in his grandmother's basement when he was 22. Yada yada yada.
We're also run by a bunch of assholes...funny, that's never really reported on.
As anyone with two eyes could plainly see via the 9 thousand logo's on Auburn's team last night, Under Armour sponsors the recently-crowned champions.
You can only imagine how excited everyone is with the big win, especially since they beat Nike...I mean, Oregon.
This is the first big sports championship we've won as a company, so we were not surprised to see an email today from one of our VP's. Maybe we'd have a celebratory pep rally to celebrate, or maybe we'd all get an Auburn/BCS t-shirt. you know, something nice.
Or, maybe we'd get an email CANCELLING a scheduled half-day on Friday!
It read in part:
"Thank you for a strong finish in 2010 and achieving our goal of exceeding $1Billion...this Friday, January 14th, will be open for a full business day, instead of the 2PM dismissal originally scheduled."

Seriously? Congratu-fucking-lations!

I wonder if Nike is hiring.

And here's the email sent to his inbox this morning from Wayne Marino, COO of Under Armour:

Team,

Thank you for a strong finish in 2010 and achieving our goal of exceeding $1Billion. We are now preparing for another great year where our targets will be even greater! We wanted to inform you of a 2011 holiday schedule change that we believe is important to maintaining our culture of exceeding expectations. In 2011, we will now close our offices at 2PM only prior to the following holidays:

Friday, May 27th
Friday, July 1st
Friday, September 2nd
Wednesday, November 23rd
Thursday, December 22nd
Thursday, December 29th

Therefore, this Friday, January 14th, will be open for a full business day, instead of the 2PM dismissal originally scheduled. Monday, January 17th will remain a Holiday in observance of Martin Luther King Day.

Click here to view the updated 2011 UA Holiday Calendar. Please be sure to mark your calendars.

We appreciate your support as we continue to work toward $2.5 Billion by 2013.

Thanks,

Wayne Marino
Chief Operating Officer

Hey, at least they get off for Martin Luther King Day. Your ski weekend isn't totally ruined, Hondo.