Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

On Saturday, Harvard and Princeton faced one another in a one-game playoff for the Ivy League title. The game ended with a splendid buzzer-beater, and now Princeton, a 13 seed, has the honor of losing to Kentucky on Thursday. (Harvard's in the NIT—the Cornell of tournaments. How fun.)

People who know something about Ivy League basketball were on hand to cover the event, and so was Jeremy Schaap, along with lots of people with expensive, functioning cameras.

Whereas this reporter had a Nikon he bought an hour before the match (the cheapest camera, his Wal-Mart attendant told him, that would take AA batteries) and an inability to remember whether it was Chris Childs or Chris Dudley who went to Yale. (A Boola, Boola for late-'90s Knicks colorblindness, please.)

Undeterred, here are some of the faces of a Harvard-Princeton neutral-site game at Yale. (Above: a gang of approaching students.)

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

This guy stood outside the gates of Payne Whitney Gym to intimidate incoming Harvard fans. Or maybe he was just waiting out there to flag his grandmother down. Either way, I was disappointed to learn that the Princeton band dressed like this. There was not, as I thought there would be, one stray douchebag in this outfit. There were 30.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

Does it really? That's kind of troubling. Why not just "accommodates"?

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

I wrote something last week about how white guys in suits were taking over sports. Look who's at the end of Harvard's bench. One of the players hit one of the WGS with a towel after a timeout. What I would have given for a faster camera.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

In my cursory notes: "12:47 left in the first half, and we've already had our third white guy fall down—two Princeton, one Harvard."

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

That guy in the suit. Oh, man. He didn't really appear to be leading the band. He just danced when they played. OK, then.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

This gentleman, who was familiar with this site's mission, expressed slight trepidation when asked for a photograph. But then he relented. No word on which client he told the partners he was golfing with this weekend.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

I can't tell exactly what these girls are going for. Maybe you can? Princeton's cheering efforts seemed like a halfway-there Charlie Sheen joke. Whereas the Harvard kids brought some impressive posters, including but not limited to "Cornel West Doesn't Publish." I had a hearty chuckle before pouring myself a snifter of brandy from the flask I had secreted in my furs.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

Yes, it was halftime. But still.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

The suit had matching pants that the son was wearing. Second-fave suit after Matthew Lesko's.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

These guys were fans of Deadspin and insisted that I take their picture. The one in the middle claimed to be a Harvard class president. Any Harvard alums, in the comm—aw, fuck it.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

One imagines these gentlemen were really upset to find that this was not a lacrosse game.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

The cutout is Harvard superstar Keith Wright. The two lads on the left have recently returned from heavy combat in the Hindu Kush.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

Some of these people are Princeton alumni, I'm sure. But at least one of them must be a layman looking for an excuse to wear an orange turtleneck or pullover.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

Here is the Princeton contingent not so much storming the court as covering it in a light mist.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

He was there, too.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

Here is assistant coach Tony Newsom with son Tyler after the game. Young Tyler, be thankful your father doesn't coach at Harvard. Try to convince him to get a job at Brown. You'll thank me when you're 18.

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

These fellows challenged me to come up in the stands and fight them, because I tried to take a photo of an unhappy Harvard fan after the loss. The fellow in the light shirt was especially caustic toward your Dicktern. I-Team, recognize him as a Cantab?

Do Not Adjust The Orange Balance On Your Monitor: The Faces Of Harvard-Princeton

And here's our friend Vikram Tiger-bombing Jeremy Schaap. Congratulations, Vikram, and we look forward to hearing how John Calipari's ass tastes.