Or the ability to hit the ground really quickly. You decide.

There's obviously some long analogy here, about Drake's character on Degrassi: the Next Generation: He was the school's basketball star until a deranged lunatic with shaggy hair (anyone from Dirk to Dan Gilbert to Mike Miller) shoots him in the back, at which point he becomes an assistant coach (second fiddle in Big Three) on the school's basketball team. Then a young player (James Jones?) says he can't take basketball lessons "from a cripple," so Drake's character wins in HORSE (beats the Celtics?) despite being wheelchair-bound. Of course, then he skips out on tryouts for the Toronto wheelchair basketball team (Team USA?) so he can paint (sell Vitamin Water) with his new crush (Maverick Carter, or, I suppose, Drake). His dad (Pat Riley) gets mad at him. He also soon finds that his paralysis (having to play with Mike Bibby) means he can't maintain an erection (maintain an erection). There's more (from which I'll spare you), because this all happened in half a season or so.

All of this is to say that Degrassi never made any fucking sense, and that LeBron will eventually become a successful, fictitious underground rapper in Toronto.

PREVIOUSLY: LeBron James Is Friends With Drake. Of Course He Is.