Your p.m. roundup for July 14, the day we went hunting for a shark in a lake but caught a duck instead. As always, don't forget to tip your editors.
What we're watching: Baseball is back after its usual three-day weekend in the middle of a July week. Strangely, only 14 teams are back on the field tonight, which means a little more than half of MLB gets another day to unwind. For your viewing pleasure, MLB Network will be presenting either Yankees-Blue Jays or Indians-Orioles (7 p.m. EDT).
Enjoy a Tony Kornheiser classic, with added footnotes:
The land looks cold and ugly, as far from summer and the abominably large mosquitoes that breed here as possible. Ryan is in his pickup truck, the same pickup he used the day before to load 2,000 pounds of bull-grower at the feed store.
7. Kornheiser says he got to spend "probably two or three full days" with Ryan, which didn't seem unusual in 1980, when national print media still possessed significant stature. "Nolan picked me up in a truck, and we drove around, and we chatted and chatted and chatted and chatted," says Kornheiser. "That would not happen - well, I don't want to say that would not happen now. I think athletes would happily let an MTV crew in, you know, I just don't think it would be a writer. But I think that they would let media in, because now they're just used to being filmed all the time."
Pitchers have pitcher names. Science says so: "Why? What does it mean? How could this possibly be? How could a baseball player's birth name have anything to do with whether he becomes a pitcher? We aren't done with this. I feel as though we have just started. Thanks to you, we have found something genuinely confusing and wonderful." [SB Nation]
The Lockout Professionals are at your service: "Hi. I used to be Ron Artest. But now, I'm Metta World Peace. And I like filing papers so much, I might change my name to I Love Filing Papers So Much." [YouTube]
Why the Mets had to move F-Rod: "Rodriguez hired Scott Boras to represent him this month, which for the Mets was a signal to trade Rodriguez as soon as possible before any constraints arose. Once the deal was made late Tuesday night, the Mets could more realistically think about re-signing Reyes, who can be a free agent after the season." [New York Times]
The Klitschko brothers' father is dead: "Vladimir Rodionovich Klitschko was stationed near Chernobyl during the 1986 nuclear disaster and participated in the immediate cleanup of the reactor's meltdown. His illness was linked to the disaster that sickened many who lived in the region." [ESPN.com]