All Involved In The Vancouver Riots Can Turn Themselves In And Get A Free Massage Or Manicure

Vancouver-area spa empire Eccotique has announced its "Calm Down and De-Stress" promotion, whereby participants in June's Vancouver riots can earn a $50 gift certificate for turning themselves to the Vancouver Police Department.

We'll let Eccotique explain:

Eccotique has come up with an arresting concept which we hope will persuade suspects of the June 15th Vancouver Stanley Cup riot to fess up, in exchange for massages, pedicures, waxes and other spa services. In return for the confessions, individuals will receive special "$50 Calm Down & De-Stress" Gift Certificates in a once-only, limited-time offer.

To qualify, each suspect must show photo ID and describe how they were involved in an illegal activity, such as looting, arson or an aggressive act. They will then apply their fingerprints to the certificate before turning themselves in to the VPD. Once in possession of an official police arrest form, their gift certificate will be activated.

This is a win/win situation for the alleged rioters and the VPD. Suspects can finally come to terms with their conscience, while the police can see justice is done. These people obviously had a lot of pent up anger during all the chaos. We think they need to learn how to calm down and relax, which fits perfectly with our spa offerings.

First in line at the spa this morning? Oddly enough, Roberto Luongo.

[Eccotique]