Patriots receiver Chad Ochocinco has more than three million Twitter followers, in part because he often engages with some of them, usually by joking around. Some of it is look-at-me self-promotion, sure, but Ochocinco is sometimes capable of laughing at himself, too.

This morning, Ochocinco woke up to find someone had smashed his rental-car window and stolen his wallet, which he had been foolish enough to leave in the vehicle's console. Throughout the day, he filled the world in on his, um, efforts to retrieve what was taken from him. You know you're just dying to learn how this plays out.

[Ride the Pine]