The Olympic Opening Ceremonies Are Pointless And WeakDrew Magary7/31/12 3:40pmFiled to: FunbagDeadspinxyOlympicsTop411EditPromoteShare to KinjaToggle Conversation toolsGo to permalinkTime for your weekly edition of the Deadspin Funbag. Got something on your mind? Email the Funbag. Today, we're covering Dwight Howard, breastfarts, porn athleticism, and more.Given all the controversy Redditors generated last week by hosting a rapist confessional thread, I began to wonder: What would happen if you confessed a phony murder on Reddit? What if got you an anonymous account and then wrote a very long-winded chronicle of the time when you were 18 and stumbled across a remote farming village in Maine, and how you decided to sneak into this one old lady's house and bludgeon her to death with a shovel? JUST BECAUSE YOU COULD. Then you played up the ensuing guilt, how you think about that poor woman's face every night before going to bed, and wondering if you deserve to burn in Hell forever, especially since you killed her grandson on my way out of the house.ShareTweet Kinja is in read-only mode. We are working to restore service.