Guantanamo Detainee Wants LeBron James To Apologize To Cleveland

Afghan Muhammed Rahim, a former translator for Osama Bin Laden, spent a long time in a CIA secret prison before being moved to Guantanamo Bay in 2008. Which is to say, he hasn't had a lot of time to check in with NBA League Pass. But even Rahim couldn't let "The Decision" pass by without a comment.

From a stack of undated letters to his (Akron-based) lawyer, which were declassified this week:

"Dear Mr. Warner! Lebron James is very bad man. He should apologise to the city of Cleveland."

According to the lawyer, the agita stems from Rahim's "tribal values" of loyalty and honor, and also the multicultural taboo of trotting out the poor kids to make your own self-aggrandizing ESPN special look less sleazy.