Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs: "Girl Goes Into Party to Fight," aka "best FIGHT on youtube." Tonight's commentator: Brawlotographer Zack Yutzey, whose filmography can be viewed via YouTube.
This was filmed during a music video I was shooting. The blonde girl was the rapper's girlfriend. She was upset because she thought the brunette was fucking around with her man.
I was setting up the shots for the next scene when it broke out, so I turned on my camera and filmed what followed.
True story: Don't mess with those rap guys' girlfriends.
Oh, and those are most definitely condoms that fall out of that chick's pockets.
Editor's note: Zack thoughtfully added the "ASS AND TITTIES ALL OVER THE PLACE IN THIS VIDEO, OH AND SOME HAIR GOT RIPPED OUT" warning to the link. And let the record reflect that this was recorded in Ohio. Massillon, Ohio to be exact.
And now, the rest of your Christmas Tuesday Night Fights:
• We start this holiday tour of the world of street fighting in Summerstrand Beach, South Africa, with a little number titled, "street fight between black and white guy Dec. 16." (Start of Violence, instantly)
• Bro In Santa Hat vs. Topless Bruh. Who ya got? (SoV, instantly)
• Ayo, sweetpea done puts some hurt on some weighty opposition. (SoV, instantly)
• The "fight breaks out on Market Street after one person (who works at a local hotel) was doused with human feces. The person who threw the feces managed to escape before the police arrived the man with no shirt was arrested.. This video aired in a segment of People Behaving Badly on KRON 4 in San Francisco and was recorded by Stanley Roberts" intermission:
• This is what happens when you call Mike Vallely a "skater fag." (SoV, 0:07)
• The chubby kid stands up to the mohawked bully. The chubby kid prevails. Yes. (SoV, 0:10)
• There was once a time when YouTube videos had stories so you cared whose ass it was and why it was fighting. This is not that time. (SoV, instantly)
• In Philadelphia, right by City Hall, there's a place called Love Park. In it, there's a statue that says LOVE. All caps. The O is shifted to the side. Nice place. I got engaged there. Anyway, this guy in a parking-lot slapfight is wearing a tank top in homage to said statue. Heartwarming. (SoV, 0:12)
• So Much Exposed Ass In This Hooker-Turf Multi-Player Brawl In What Can Only Be Described As Heaven Intermezzo:
• Don't think we've seen this McDonald's brawl before, what with there being so many McDonald's brawls out there. It is the godless fast-food restaurant which opens its doors on Christmas Day. Eat Mor Jesus. (SoV, instantly)
• Point of order: Stick around if you ever see a bunch of white people fighting by a bonfire, for there WILL be a cameo by the most 'Merican shirt thine eyes will take in. (SoV, 0:09)
• Not sure where "P town" is. Portland, Oregon? Provincetown, Mass.? Wherever it is, its ladies done got themselves Worldstarred last week. Respeck. (SoV, instantly)
• "Beat The Boy For What He Was Walking With His Girlfriend" Proper Fight-Recording Case Study:
• From TNF Beijing Correspondent Anthony Tao: "Police Stand Around And Watch While Gangsters Carry Out Brutal Assault." (SoV, 0:13)
• While this does not evolve to lady-on-lady action, one of said ladies has a whole lot to say before, during and after she takes out her aggressions on the other said lady's vehicle. Suburbia. (SoV, 1:20)
• Detroit Parking-Lot Fighters In Their Natural Habitat Live Look-In:
• It is the loving embrace at the end of these five minutes and 17 confusing seconds that serves as the perfect —30— to this street rumpus. (SoV, 0:04)
• Hele podívej sú to Hatfields a McCoys Slovenska! (KN, 0:05)
• Others: "Girls Street Fight." "Epic street fight episode 3 FIGHTING AT MCDONALDS." "LIRR Fight." "street fight." "Indian Girl Beating Man on Street - Must Watch." "CASHIER GOES OFF AT HOME DEPOT!!" "Girls get into a fight over Mitt Romney."
• The Big Mamma's Tiddies Coda: