OK, OK—keep it together, man. Don't laugh. "Hampered by rain." Don't you dare laugh. Just—just read the article. You can do that. "...billed this year's Pro Bowl as Peyton Manning vs. Eli Manning, a battle of the brothers, with the headline: 'Footballs Will Fly.'"
Ohhhh my god stop it. Just stop it, you're being ridiculous. "...a weather system coming through Oahu could make footballs fly in all sorts of directions." You bastard. Why are you doing this to me?
"It will be interesting to see the effort level..." I swear to god. I swear. To god. This just isn't even funny anymore. I'm over it. Don't even have to worry about chuckling to myself—forget laughing.
"After Friday's practice, Peyton Manning said, 'The guys will be ready to play. It will be a good, competitive game, I think.'"
[Three hours of laughter comes to an abrupt end.]
"Hmm, I don't see that on my list." [looks down]