<![CDATA[Deadspin: Chris Cooley]]> http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/base/img/thumbs140x140/deadspin.com.png <![CDATA[Deadspin: Chris Cooley]]> http://deadspin.com/tag/Chris Cooley http://deadspin.com/tag/Chris Cooley <![CDATA[Someone Drew A Dong On Chris Cooley's Finger Cast]]> Cooley's dong has long been a friend of Deadspin, and we're glad that the Redskins TE finally embraced his inner donginess, even if it took a broken index finger to do it. He's out up to six weeks. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5850610&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley Loves To See Tony Romo Fail]]> Washington Redskins tight ends: They're just like us! Chris Cooley, down-to-earth potter, also finds strange gratification in seeing Tony Romo fail. During his weekly guest spot on the LaVar and Dukes show in Washington, Cooley fed the rivalry by sharing how he really feels about the Cowboys QB: More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5846671&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Whoever Broke Into Chris Cooley's Art Gallery Did Not Care Much For The Art]]> Local police in Leesburg, Va. are searching for the suspect that broke into Chris Cooley's art gallery on South King Street early Friday morning. Thankfully, no art or pottery was stolen in the burglary. More importantly, though, Chris Cooley owns an art gallery. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5836898&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Redskins TE Chris Cooley Discusses Why He'd Want To Punish Snooki]]> The 2011 Washington Auto Show played the fame card in booking Redskins tight end Chris Cooley and Seaside Heights low center of gravity Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi to appear. This CSNWashington video indicates that the encounter lasted mere seconds. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5751366&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[What It Feels Like To Get A Concussion]]> Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Redskins tight end Chris Cooley. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5668085&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Donovan McNabb Has A Small Child In His Locker]]> Click to view Don't call Chris Hansen; Chris Cooley put it there to leap out and scare McNabb after the new QB finishes up with the media. Spoiler alert: it works. [Cooley Zone] More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5606607&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley, Chugging Condiments]]> Our old friend Chris Cooley is back. No, he's not showing us his penis this time. But after seeing this video, we almost wish he had. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5563005&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Listen In As Chris Cooley Gets Pulled Over While On The Phone With Radio Show]]> Cooley, while talking with DC's Sports Junkies on WJFK-FM, was pulled over by a cop this morning for going too wide around a corner. Pro athletes: They're just like us! (Only they manage to wriggle out of their moving violations.) [WashPost; audio] More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5525735&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[The Top 10 Most Visited Deadspin Stories Of The Deadspin Decade]]> One more rundown before we start talking about stuff in 2010. These are the top 10 most popular posts of the Deadspin decade (2005-2009). It's an interesting glimpse into the psyche of the internet viewer. (Low-to-high, as usual.) More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5438483&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley Opens Up About Jim Zorn And Other Things]]> "He does not like short shorts; I was directly made aware of that. But it's not like he's a jerk about it. He'll just talk to you." [Washingtonian] More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5341766&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Why Your Team Sucks: Washington Redskins]]> Some people are fans of the Washington Redskins and Chris Cooley's wife. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Washington Redskins. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5339893&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Deadspin HOF Nominee: Crossing Pattern Dong]]> The Deadspin Hall of Fame is not just for individuals: It is for themes, for common bonds, for lasting memes ... for dongs. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5328538&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley Forced To Talk To NFL Shrink For Accidental Penis-Showing Incident]]> Unwittingly revealing your junk to the world is awful, but then having to go through a mandatory psychiatric evaluation because of it, only adds to the humiliation. That's what happened to Chris Cooley. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5235910&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley's New Web Reality Show Looks Tremendous]]> It looks incredibly entertaining, but it also seems to have a distinctive "Reality Bites" vibe. Hopefully, they'll put Chris, Tanner, and their respective spouses on a cartoon pizza. Fuck you, water hole. [Mister Irrelevant] More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5213347&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley Would Like To Address Those Evil Trade Rumors]]> Redskins tight end Chris Cooley has taken to his blog (and his Facebook status) to let the world know that he's not getting traded. Especially not to Cleveland. Barf. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5174059&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley's Big Fight-Night Date With Alexander Ovechkin Gets Ruined By Overzealous Fans]]> "I do have a new favorite fan encounter though. It goes something like this "Just shake my hand! Cooley! Just a fucking handshake! Please! Cooley! I'll just wait, whenever your ready. Just a handshake." [ChrisCooley'sBlog] More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5158858&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[SHOTY Elite Eight: Chris Cooley Vs. Erin Andrews]]> To be honest, I'm a little surprised by this matchup: Caitlin Davis seemed to have solid upset potential, and Erin Andrews ... well, I guess you can't underestimate the power of the sideboob. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5109408&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[SHOTY First Round: Dana Jacobson Vs. Erin Andrews]]> It's the final first round matchup, and it's a fun one, methinks. Ah, if only these two pictures could somehow be combined. Anyway, this is the last time with a new matchup. So everybody vote. Yes, please, Facebook people too. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5103777&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[SHOTY First Round: Chris Cooley Vs. Caitlin Davis]]> Just two more first-round matchups until we reach the Elite Eight. We haven't had any truly close matchups yet, though it's early. Today, it's Hot Pants/ Naked Playbook Guy Vs. Hot Pants / Goofy Facebook Lady. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5103774&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[The Person Most Troubled By Chris Cooley's Playbook Package? Mom, Of Course]]> It's a shame that we missed this earlier, but with the enormous amount of Chris Cooley dong-related news floating around out there the last couple weeks, some of it was carelessly overlooked. Including this interesting story from Monday, where the Washington Post's Mike Wise approached the Cooley family, er, member most affected by the the Redskins' tight end's loose noodle: Chris's mom. Nancy Cooley makes a point of commending how great of a person her son is how he's never smoked or used drugs (he does like the occasional Yuengling or rum drink, though) and was part of the National Honor Society in high school. She seems legitimately in awe of her own good fortune for having such a successful, down-to-earth, and genuinely decent human being as a son. Still, she can't hide her disappointment after last weekend's unfortunate unveiling:
"It's never a good day when you hear there's a picture of your son's penis on the Internet"
As a high school teacher in Norfolk, Nancy Cooley also had to confront the situation first hand with some of her students once Chris's peen hit the mainstream.:
"I saw your son's blog on the Internet," a couple of students told Miss C. "We're not going to talk about that," Nancy said. "It was an accident and I'm sorry. And that's it."
Poor lady. Cooley Knows Best: Cooley Was Simply Guilty Of An Innocent Mistake [WaPo] More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5054928&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Who's Sorry Now? Chris Cooley Edition]]> The nation is still buzzing over Wienergate; when Redskins tight end Chris Cooley posted a naked photo of himself — including shlong — on his personal blog over the weekend. This has caused much consternation at Clan Cooley; the photo was removed late Sunday, and now Chris has issued a mea culpa. It's probably the most significant penis apology since the Clinton administration. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5050461&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley's Accidental Nude Blogging Causes Stress For Cooley Family, Inc.]]> I'm not big on saving too many text messages, but the one I received at 9:02 p.m. last evening while sitting in a Chili's in Hermosa Beach will probably be archived for eternity:"Hey, it's Tanner Cooley. I need to talk to you about my brother's cock picture on the site. Call me." Yesterday when KOGOD posted about Redskins' tight end Chris Cooley's unfortunate shlong-reveal it wasn't expected to elicit as much of a reaction as it did. Chris Cooley, who's very open on his personal blog and whom maintains a very high profile in sports blog circles, may have (we thought) posted his flaccid member and hairy peach basket on purpose. We now know it wasn't intentional. Tanner, Chris's younger brother and surrogate for all of Chris' off-field activities was "very stressed" after his big brother's penis popped up on his personal blog yesterday morning. We did show the full picture on our site for a while, but the decision was made to use Playing The Field's Redskin photoshop because, well, we afforded the same discretion to Santonio Holmes' anaconda when it popped up on some dating site. And, honestly, does it really do us any good to show unencumbered athlete wang on the site? (Don't answer that.) It happened, it's hilarious, and if you do want to see Cooley's sleeping turtle PTF has watermarked it for posterity. Tanner is now in prime spin mode, making the rounds, doing his best to explain why on earth his brother chose to blog naked in the first place. (Why? Because apparently Chris was "getting ready for the game.") And, hey, the Redskins won and he snared five catches. Maybe it should be a pre-game ritual for the rest of the season. How Chris Cooley's Privates Hit The Internet [Sports Bog] More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5049977&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Cooley Exposed More Than His Playbook]]> Chris Cooley, a friend of the bloggers as well as an accomplished blogger in his own right, had a nice day on the field today, but I don't think that's what people are going to remember come tomorrow. Earlier today Chris posted on his official blog about a fun section of the playbook that Jim Zorn asks his players to decorate for themselves (he's like a bohemian football coach!) as well as a position test he took to prepare for today's opponents. What he may or may not have realized is that he was also posting a picture of his dick for the world to see. The uncropped image is after the jump in all its not safe for work glory. Update after the jump. I honestly have no idea whether or not he might have done this on purpose, but considering his quirky personality and prankster ways it wouldn't be entirely unsurprising. I guess we'll know for sure if he's quick to yank it...uh...so yeah, please continue sending us your tips...uhhh.... UPDATE: Yeah, so apparently that was just one unfortunate accident, one of the many hazards of nude blogging. The Cooley's have responded by removing the post from their blog, and according to text message from Chris's brother Tanner to our own Balls AJ, he wasn't happy to see his brother's cock meandering its way around the internet. But hey, nobody wants to see their brother's cock anywhere. Seeing as how the photograph was in fact an accident, and not Chris Cooley's homage to Charles Hayley, we've replaced it with the above photoshopped image courtesy of our friends at Playing the Field. For now, at least. Stay tuned tomorrow for updates as this story of accidental nudity develops. Perhaps in the end we'll learn that they were in fact the balls of one Tobias Fünke. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5049712&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley and the Redskins' Fantasy Football Draft]]> There's an exception for fantasy football posts when actual NFL players are involved, right? Crickets. Anyway, Fred Smoot steals the draft show. But is that really any surprise? Also of note, Colt Brennan going with LenDale White in what appears to be the first round of the draft. Decision making remains Colt's strong suit. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5045360&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley-ooley-ooley-o Is Making All Men Look Silly]]> Redskin Chris Cooley's nuptials are happening this Friday, and what better way to express his joyfulness and show off his hot-ass soon-to-be wife than post a long, heartfelt story about his pending marriage at the House That Mottram Built. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=5010434&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley's Gonna Have A Hot Wife]]> And now, boys and girls, it's time for a love story. It may resemble one you yourself have encountered, except this one involves people prettier than you. It's a story we've all heard: boy meets girl, girl is a cheerleader, boy meets another cheerleader, girls lose jobs because of boy, boy wins back girl ... um, somehow. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=288502&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[John Stockton Thinks This Is Excessive]]> Brandon Lloyd (I think that's who it is) appears to be impressed with the look. I can't tell if that look on his face says, "Man, you are crazy," or "I sho' wouldn't mind hittin' that from the back." More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=269556&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Chris Cooley's Pyrrhic Victory]]> The good news for Redskins TE Chris Cooley in last years game against Dallas is that he busted loose for three touchdowns in a 35-7 victory. The bad news was that in one of Cooley's four fantasy leagues, as noted here in the Washington Post, his fantasy opponent started Cooley against him. Cooley's three-TD performance eliminated Cooley's fantasy team from the playoffs. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=193879&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Finally Making Some Money Off Southeast Jerome]]> Fully capitalizing on something it stumbled across last season, the official Redskins site Redskins.com is now selling T-shirts adorned with every Clinton Portis character from his press conferences last year. Those who were with us last season will remember our schoolgirl crush on Portis, particularly Coach Janky Spanky, who resembled pretty much every gym teacher we've ever had. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=192092&view=rss&microfeed=true <![CDATA[Southeast Jerome In Heaven With Friends]]> OK, so as we showed you yesterday, Clinton Portis brought along some pals for his press conference yesterday. The conceit was that Southeast Jerome — who had been previously considered "lost" — had died and made it to heaven with all his friends. They included: More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=145842&view=rss&microfeed=true