After nine years in the NFL, DT Anthony "Spice" Adams didn't catch on with a team for 2012. Instead, he chronicled the life of a free agent: boredom, desperation, lots of Capri Sun. Now he's calling it a career, in the most Anthony Adams way imaginable.

The first minute of the video focuses on Adams's accomplishments—then it's off to drum up press for his goodbye press conference. Regrettably, no one showed up for the ceremony at a Chicago-area White Castle, except for his kids and one confused patron.

We hope Adams will continue to make these videos, or at least keep putting his creativity to use. He's the rare pro athlete we're not worried about after retirement.