This is David Chang. He's a restaurateur from Northern Virginia most famous for creating the Momofuku empire, and more importantly, he appears to possess the same winning smile, bone structure, and gentle gaze as current Deadspin editor Tommy Craggs. Last night, he tweeted that he sort of wants to buy the Washington Redskins from owner Dan Snyder:
— Dave Chang (@davidchang) December 10, 2013
We say "sort of wants to buy" because it sounds like he wants us—Redskins fans, shit-stirrers, and haters of the unwashed prolapsed rectum of a man that is Snyder—to put up money for him to buy it. Like, a lot of our money. Six billion dollars, in fact, would be all of our money.
Chang's a Georgetown Prep boy who grew up rooting for the Redskins, and though he's a millionaire chef who's appeared on shows like Top Chef: All Stars and Treme, he doesn't have football team money. The question, then, is if there is any evidence at all that Chang would be a better or less bad owner than Dan Snyder. There is not.
Still, we're willing to go out on a limb and say he won't and can't be all that worse than Snyder, which is worth five bucks any day. As of now, there's no Kickstarter campaign to buy the Redskins, and it might be all bullshit anyway, but Chang might have something here.
Then again, that's a whole lot of billions. If he somehow did get his hands on $6 billion, why would he spend it on the Redskins, who Forbes recently valued at only $1.7 billion? Is it all going to Snyder? Why not just buy a good team? Does he get to keep our change?