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It was a frightful beating that gave rise to Deadspin's ongoing search for the meaning of Bartolo Colon—the 38-year-old Yankees starter got knocked out of the first inning against the Blue Jays, surrendering 8 runs (3 earned), an outing so bad it raised questions about the pitcher's very purpose in this world. Questions about all of us. More »
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Things got better on Friday for Bartolo Colon, the Yankees' veteran starter and living parable. Yet things also got no better. Pitted against 28-year-old Angels ace Jered Weaver, the 38-year-old Colon found that his arm was fresh, his control everything he wanted it to be. "I feel like I did at the beginning of the season," he said afterward. Rookie Jesus Montero homered off Weaver in the third inning, giving Colon a 1-0 lead. More »
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Tipster Spatt sent this photo of happy handed activities in the Yankees dugout last evening, along with the observation, "Apparently Bartolo Colon didn't like the feel of Jesus Montero's balls. Looks like Montero doesn't mind though. Ah, the perks of the Big Leagues." More »
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Bartolo Colon, the Yankees' veteran pitcher and embodiment of struggle against the all-consuming void, pitched again on Saturday. Or did he? He came in on a three-game losing streak; the Yankees won; he is still on a three-game losing streak. His line: 6.1 IP, 7 H, 4 R, 7 K, 1 BB, 2 HR. More »
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How can hope be the enemy of human endeavor? That was the question facing Bartolo Colon Sunday afternoon, as the Yankees pitcher-philosopher took the mound against Zach Britton of the Baltimore Orioles—veteran against rookie, righty against lefty, metaphor for inexorable despair against metaphor for the power of wishfulness. More »
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What did Bartolo Colon teach us about our place in the universe last night? Special philosophical correspondent David Roher was at the ballpark to witness the veteran Yankee's performance against Oakland, as Colon fell behind the A's 5-0—with two of the runs scoring after he'd left the game, on a double served up by his former rescuer, Boone Logan. More »
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Bartolo Colon, Yankee pitcher and existential protagonist, found himself beset by 14 men last night. Nine of his antagonists were Kansas City Royals hitters-including Billy Butler, who launched a fly ball to somewhere around the top of the outfield fence in the third inning. Four more of his opponents were the umpires, who declared that Butler's ball had cleared the fence for a home run, and then upheld that call even after reviewing a video that strongly suggested otherwise. The last and most unbeatable foe: Royals pitcher Bruce Chen, who held the Yankees to 3 runs in 6 innings, running his record to 8-5. By the time Chen left the mound, Colon was already gone. Colon's final line: 5 IP, 7 H, 5 R, 3 K. And 2 HR, according to the umps. What does it all mean? It means he got beat by Bruce Chen. More »
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Veteran pitcher Bartolo Colon resumed his philosophical explorations yesterday afternoon, facing the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim. Angels! Emissaries of the divine! But Colon met the Halos with yet another stolid performance: 6.0 IP, 5 H, 2 R, 3 K. One more no-decision, in one more eventual Yankees victory. It's almost as if, rather than being the storm-tossed embodiment of man's aloneness, Colon is a steady contributor to a collective effort. Throw 90-some pitches, keep the Yankees in the game, let the bullpen and the bats and the law of averages prevail. More »
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New York Yankees starting pitcher Bartolo Colon threw himself-and all humanity-on the mercy of the universe Friday night, by daring to pitch against the Boston Red Sox. And the universe delivered a mixed verdict: 4.2 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 K, hooked for Boone Logan with the bases loaded in the fifth. The Yankees rallied to win, 3-2. Maybe Boone Logan is the new repository of meaningfulness? More »
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Bartolo Colon, the Yankees' veteran pitcher and repository of ultimate philosophical truths, battled once more against entropy and meaninglessness on Saturday. Also against the Baltimore Orioles. A hit batsman and an error behind him put Colon on the ropes in the first inning, but he struck out Mark Reynolds with the bases loaded, then lasted through the fifth inning, by which time the Yankees had taken the lead for keeps. Final line: 5 IP, 2 H, 2 R, 6 K, 105 pitches. Life is not without toil, but the spirit can prevail. More »
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Yesterday, the New York Yankees' veteran salvage-heap starter — and barometer of existential significance — took the mound against the Oakland Athletics. How did he (and by extension, all humankind) fare? 7.0 IP, 8 H, 2 R, 4 K. Joy reigns once more, till the next time. More »
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Life is a small sample. So what are the metaphysical implications of the most recent game pitched by the Yankees' 38-year-old fourth starter? After July 14 (0.2 IP, 8 H, 6 R, 0 K), "Defeat had simply taken wonder's place." Last night? 6.1 IP, 5 H, 3 R, 9 K. Wonder is back! More »
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"For the last few years," The New York Times writes in the Bartolo Colon story that we flagged earlier today, "baseball and other sports, while fighting to limit the use of performance-enhancing drugs, have been faced with a new and murky challenge: players getting sophisticated blood treatments, often from doctors whose practices involve the regular use of H.G.H." More »
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A Dominican medical team designed a rejuvenation treatment, in which they'd inject stem cells into the pitching arm, for Pedro Martinez. He turned them down. Bartolo Colon didn't. More »
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There's no visual evidence of Bartolo Colon's whereabouts—NASA is working on it—but the White Sox say he will pitch tonight. His "disappearance" was really just an aversion to phones and an inability to cope with MJ's passing. More »
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The White Sox seemed to have lost something. It's about six feet high, 250 pounds (roughly), and occasionally has trouble locating its curveball. Oh, and it's scheduled to start tonighttomorrow so if you've seen a Bartolo Colon anywhere, please call. More »
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Poor Bartolo Colon. 8 runs (only one earned, though!) in two innings of work and then the world caved in. [Yahoo!] More »
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Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to tips@deadspin.com. Subject: Morning crap. More »
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