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Today's a glorious day. Michael Tunison aka Kwanzaa Primate's utterly fantastic book has arrived and he's graciously given us an excerpt. Plus! He's here to live chat with you. Buy it then pepper him with inane questions. More »
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KSK spotlights this Le Batard column detailing the silver-haired coach's quest to live life like a Jimmy Buffet song. Pirate party next week at JJ's! [KSK] More »
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This year is the 20th anniversary of John Madden football and to commemorate this historic occasion, the folks at EA Sports held a "MaddenPalooza" event in Los Angeles. Deadspin dispatched Michael Tunison to cover some of the sights, sounds, and overall geekiness. This is his second dispatch from the Rose Bowl festivities. Enjoy. More » More »
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As time marches on from the contentious Leitch-Bissinger showdown on HBO, more and more mainstream writers are weighing in on the matter. And, for the most part, they're not getting any more insightful. The latest comes courtesy of The Washington Post's Len Shapiro, who, while conceding that Buzz Bissinger hurt his argument with his behavior on Bob Costas' show, thinks the journalist and author should not back down from his core points: that blogs are full of filth-flarn-filth and are the end of the world as we know it. Of course, Shapiro does so while trafficking in the usual hoary cliches about bloggers (they're uninformed and their commenters are anonymous cowards) and generally displaying little familiarity with the medium he derides. More »
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What you missed while mixing your sports metaphors... More »
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The young man in this picture, enjoying himself with the Pittsburgh Parrot, is Michael Tunison. He has two lives. In one, he is Michael Tunison, reporter for The Washington Post. In the other, he is Christmas Ape, one of the crew at Kissing Suzy Kolber and a weekend editor at this here site. Earlier this week, these two worlds collided when Tunison shed his anonymity. In most cases, this turns out well for bloggers; heck, Jason McIntyre is getting freelance work now. It did not turn out well for Mr. Tunison. More »
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Now, at last, is the Jayhawks' chance to extract some measure of revenge against Huckleberry Roy Williams, he who doesn't comprehend the enmity, by denying him another title that he couldn't win them. In this likely shootout, a lot hinges on whether the three-man rotation of Sasha Kaun (Sasha Kaun!), Darnell Jackson and Darrell Arthur can help slow stupid-face Psycho T. More »
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It's a non-selective Sunday without a great deal of intriguing matchups (sorry those looking for an Avalanche-Stars breakdown), so my attention turns to the grand finale of what has been hailed by a great many pundits as the Greatest TV Show of All-Time. I'm not qualified to make that judgment, but The Wire easily ranks at the top in my list. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=365668&view=rss&microfeed=true Jaguars defensive tackle John Henderson needs that extra little slap in the face to get ready for gametime. Funny, as Brett Myers does the same thing to his wife come bedtime. I'd like to think Joe there was hired solely for this purpose. As seen on Jaguars job board: "Wanted: fella with shaved head to meekly slap mammoth killer of men in the face." Why not take it a step further and hire a dandy to slap him with white glove? I know that'd get me riled. More »
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Tomorrow's a pretty big primary day for the Dems, what with Texas, Ohio and, to a much lesser extent Rhode Island and Vermont, going a long way to determining who the nominee will be. With Greg Oden and Leigh Steinberg recently publicly throwing their support behind Barack Obama, we're once again confronted with the notion that we're supposed to care what athletes', or for that matter any celebrity's, views on politics are. I mean, other than Charles Barkley, of course. Hold forth, Sir Charles. More »
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Much of your human world continues to horrify and confuse me, most of all your bizarre construct of weekdays. The one you call Will has cast me into my Monday bondage by bludgeoning my mate to death with his advanced human weaponry. How ever did you concoct stick with a nail in it? Sadly, I am now in his thrall until Bubbles the Monkey God sees it right to call me home. More »
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New weekend editor Christmas Ape tried out to be one of the guys who run the Presidents Races at Washington Nationals games. Here's how it went. More »
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Hey, loogit, there's an All-Star Game on. And it sounds as though it's slightly less boring than pointless spectacles past! I don't know, I'm at work and can't watch it. But the uniforms? Ugly! More »
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It's been a great opening stint of Weekend Daddy Duty for me, despite my many unplanned trips to Deadspin future. As a result of my poor choice of journalism as a career I'm now at the office and will be through the rest of the evening covering shootings and such in D.C. but luckily I'm off tomorrow. More »
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Notch a critical victory in the Davis Cup over Romania? A common American response to winning is to while away hours and hours and perhaps your signing bonus in the strip club. Just ask the G-men. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=357443&view=rss&microfeed=true When not occupied with domestic abuse or calling reporters retards, Phillies pitcher Brett Myers fancies himself quite the mischievous clubhouse presence. Here, he's gotten manager Charlie Manuel, some beat reporters and GM Ruben Amaro in on the act of fooling pitcher Kyle Kendrick into thinking he's been dealt to a Japanese team. More »
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At what point is it okay to call in the all-white team? Just ask UNC. [Mister Irrelevant]

Michael Beasley better than Durant? Wwwhhhaaa? [FanIQ]

Get your hands on a copy of Mark Cuban's junior year high school yearbook. [Yardbarker]

Wanna get thrown out of Assembly Hall? Wear one of these. [Bad Idea Blue Jeans]

Pedro Martinez has a curious diet. [Macrochip]

Tim Wakefield takes the highway to the dangerzone. [Sox & Dawgs]

Did early steriod use cause Ronaldo's knee problems? [Steroid Nation]

A rundown of All-Star Game kicks. [The Sporting Blog]

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]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=357414&view=rss&microfeed=true I'm not well versed in the ways of the ruggers, but I know the sound at the beginning of this clip is a tad unsettling, and that this was possibly a mite bit painful. More »
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What to watch while waiting for your high school chemistry teacher to join Marlo's crew...

NCAA: Ohio State at Michigan, 1 p.m. [CBS]

Movie: True Grit, 1 p.m. [TCM]

NASCAR: Daytona 500, 2 p.m. [FOX]

Movie: Friday Night Lights, 2:30 p.m. [FX]

NHL: Detroit Red Wings at Dallas Stars, 3:30 p.m. [NBC]

TV: The Simpsons, 8 p.m. Eh, it's new. [FOX]

NBA: All-Star Game, 8:30 p.m. [TNT]

TV: The Wire, 9 p.m. That Templeton sure is a rat. HEY-OOO! [HBO]

TV: Breaking Bad, 10 p.m. Science and drugs, together at last. [AMC]

More »
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For its top selling Madden NFL franchise, Electronic Arts Tiburon typically selects an electrifying player who epitomizes the furious intensity of NFL action, while appealing to average young football fan. More »
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Sure, it's no conversation about bewbs with Reggie Miller, but stuff like this could actually get me to watch the Sunday morning politics shows. We have but six years to gear up for the Barkley gubernatorial run. Any chance he could run against Nick Saban? Have Dwayne Wade in his cabinet? At least it will assure there will be no trans fat ban in the state. More »
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Finally the right man wins the dunk contest. This is what happens when you don't allow Michael Jordan to be a judge, even if Darryl Dawkins is perhaps his equal in hateration. Howard stole the show in what many are saying was one of the best dunk contests ever, if at least in recent memory. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=357396&view=rss&microfeed=true What you missed while attempting to shake the cops with blown tires.

NCAA: No. 1 Memphis escapes UAB with a 79-78 victory. Sorry, Nicaraguan kids, no 25-0 shirts for you.

Boxing: Kelly Pavlik defeats Jermain Taylor again to remain undefeated, this time by unanimous decision. Ohioans are pleased enough to spell out the name of their state.

NHL: The Canadiens hand the Flyers their sixth loss in a row, via Carey Price's first career shutout.

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Welp, that's it for today, folks. Enjoy the Skills Competition, which, like the Home Run Derby in baseball, is far more enjoyable than the All-Star Game itself. More »
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Tampa Bay Devil Rays pitcher Scott Kazmir thinks that through gut, determination, and a few plane crashes involving about 10 other American League teams, his team has a shot at the postseason. More »
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The Falcons yesterday parted ways with seven players, including four-time Pro Bowl tight end Alge Crumpler and quarterback Byron Leftwich, who has capped a rapid descent from starting quarterback to journeyman with an unsure future. More »
]]> http://deadspin.com/index.php?op=postcommentfeed&postId=357357&view=rss&microfeed=true The inimitable Southside Steve here holds a stimulating chinwag with John RACKA about the ever-pressing subject of breastesesestsss. See, Leitch, this is how you ask the challenging questions. When's Southside Steve putting out a book? There's a guy with something to say! More »
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The Wizards Dance Team has some mildly risque pics of its own. Someone call Fox News. [Don Chavez] More »
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Hey, wow, Liverpool lost to, uh, Barnsley. That sounds like an upset, I think. Don't ask me, I'm a red-blooded blinkered American simian who don't truck no foreigner sports. I'm sure the losers all groused and said things like "poxy" and called each "prats" and ate bad food with their jagged teeth. I'm secure in my inaccurate stereotypes, thank you. More »
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What to watch while planning a vacation to Bill Simmons' "Mount Rapmore" More »
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Having just been alerted by the Mid-Atlantic Hockey League that their season was over at the halfway mark, the Jamestown Vikings decided that they were still vikings after all and proved as much by trashing the historic Viking Lodge in Jamestown, NY. More »
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It's two weeks after Losergate (or, if you will, Super Bowl XLII) and people are still making a hue and cry over cheating charges leveled at the now-humbled Patriots. The latest comes from former Rams player Willie Gary and two Rams season ticket holders, who are suing the Pats, seeking $100 million and a portion of Robert Kraft's stake in Russian petrodollars because the Pats taped the Rams walkthrough the day prior to Super Bowl XXXVI. More »
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Greetings, Deadspinners. I am Christmas Ape, the latest in a glorious succession of Kissing Suzy Kolber writers to serve as your Weekend Editor. Those of you who are regular readers over there probably know me for chronicling the imaginary exploits of Philip Rivers and posting the occasional picture of my cat. More »
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After getting through Thursday night's season kick-off with John Madden only drawing one penis on the screen, Eli Manning is hoping he'll pick up the slack for this evening's tilt, as Manning's Giants travel to Texas Stadium to wage battle in a manner most NFC East with the Cowboys. More »
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San Diego 14, Chicago 3 LaDainian Tomlinson made up for a fallow first half with a flush fantasy second, throwing for one touchdown and rushing for another, but still managing only 25 yards on 17 carries. Tommy Harris can jump offsides all he damn pleases, it's still not making up for a parlous Bears offense. More »
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All possessors of the first pick in their fantasy football leagues would like to have a word with LDT at the moment, as the reigning NFL MVP (though Pacman Jones is the raining NFL MVP) has 12 yards on 11 carries in the first half against the Bears. More »
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Apparently the Patriots are good (but we still hate them). Randy Moss hauls in nine for 183 yards and all the white Patriots fans can glory because Wes Welker got in the endzone as well. Did Belichick shake Mangini's hand? Do I care? Well, actually — no, I mean, no. More »
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If there's a theme to Saturday nights, it's saying and doing things you regret on Sunday. Therefore, here follows a round-up of the various mealy-mouthed guarantees and guarded boasting that amounts to this week's "bulletin board material." You said you're confident in your team's chances of victory if you execute properly and not beat yourself. Fuck no, you didn't! That's you assuming you're not inherently inferior. That's disrespect at its most blatant! I'll meet you at the 50-yard line with my half-shirt on. GWRAARRR! More »
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